05/18/2026
135 - The Caring Company (MON 18MAY2026)
EmSoft started in 1984 in the founder's parents' garage, and wanted to differentiate itself from the other major players in the microcomputer OS field of the day, so it said it was "The Caring Company". The founder's parents were multimillionaires, and the "garage" had until that point housed Daddy's Formula 1 team, so don't imagine that this was quite a cottage industry. And the subsequent decades have profoundly undermined any of EmSoft's claims to actually care. About anybody, especially users of their products.
At this point, the company has decided that the potential PR disaster of abandoning the slogan and publicly announcing that, actually, they no longer care would cause more lasting trouble and damage than the constant trolling they get for still including such an bald-faced lie on their company website.
Nobody believes EmSoft cares. Not daily users, not toddlers first experiencing the deeply un-fun "EmSoft Toddler Fun-Play" app on mummy's tablet, not sapient technological creatures present in star systems within 42 light years from Earth. A paper published in Nature in 2021 proves that even planarians react negatively to EmSoft products. (Especially to Chippy[TM]!)
Despite this, their software is present on 74.2% of all microchip computing devices on the planet, including computers, smart phones, space stations, drones and orbiting space lasers. Their "don't actually care" is global. But it's also very, very personal.