01/19/2024
8 years ago vs yesterday.
8 years ago I was in my last year of my 20s. In a deeply misaligned relationship. Drinking everyday. Looking for anything external to "fix" me. Incredibly unhealthy on the inside. Overwhelmed with everything that felt off in my life. So much self hatred. Never taking care of my body. And taking any exit ramp on the highway of life every chance I got.
But I love that woman so much. With all her fear, overwhelm, confusion, avoidance...she kept showing up every day. Searching for ways to feel better. Beginning to question everything she knew. Trusting that tiny flame that was still within her to keep going.
It would take another 6 years after that picture to get the courage to leave. Another year and half to put the bottle down. Start moving my body in ways that felt good. Feeding myself for fuel and not feelings. Fanning the flames of my own soul to rise after the burning down. Setting an almost impossible standard for love, that finally a man surpassed all expectations.
The journey is what made me into the woman I am today. Had my past self not shown up for my current self...I wouldn't be here. And that alone gives me the drive to focus my current self on my future self and blow my own damn mind about what is possible. 🖤✌🏻
If you feel lost, keep putting one foot in front of the other. Just take the next right step. And before you know it...the path will unfold.
