12/06/2025
THE REAL STORY OF RELIGION⦠AND THE FUNNY LIES WE NEVER QUESTIONED
Can you blame folks who think religion feels suspicious sometimes?
Be honest.
You wanna tell me that these dudes literally sat in a hot room, looked at a dark-skinned Middle Eastern man named Yeshua,
and said something like:
āFellas⦠what if we lighten him up a bit?
Just a pinch.
Like⦠twelve shades.ā
Next thing you know, they created a version of Jesus who looks like he just finished a violin recital in Switzerland.
Then they mailed those paintings across the world like spiritual Amazon Primeā¦
and Grandma hung it on the wall like it was her nephew from Monrovia.
Now hold up, because hereās where the comedy turns into truth:
A sound mind cannot say they worship a dark-skinned Yeshua on Sundayā¦
and then discriminate against dark-skinned people on Monday.
Thatās not religion.
Thatās a logic error.
Thatās spiritual WiFi with no password.
It makes no sense.
None.
Zero megabytes of sense.
How you gonna worship a Messiah with melanin but treat melanin-rich people like theyāre the problem?
That is one of the most delusional inventions since creation. If confusion had cousins, that would be all of them.
And the funniest part?
Some of the same people doing the judging will scream ādevils are attacking!ā
Bruh⦠itās not demons.
Itās the contradiction.
Your theology is glitching.
Letās get into the real history now that weāve laughed:
Every major religion on Earth is a remix.
⢠Judaism grew among Afro-Asiatic people
⢠Christianity was shaped in North Africa, Egypt, Ethiopia
⢠Islam spread through African trade routes and inherited Jewish and Christian traditions
⢠African spiritual systems were already doing astronomy, ethics, and psychology before Europe learned how to spell āEuropeā
⢠Indigenous belief systems carried environmental science and generational wisdom modern society still canāt explain
Humanity has always shared ideas.
Trade routes were basically ancient social media. Everybody was borrowing from everybody.
But then⦠somebody rewrote the script, painted the cast, and sold it as the final version.
And here we are centuries later still arguing,
still confused,
still worshiping the picture instead of the truth.
Because at the core, hereās what they never taught us:
You canāt claim the faith
if you refuse to claim the humanity.
You canāt praise brown-skinned prophets
and then mistreat brown-skinned people.
You canāt talk about love
and then weaponize the same book to justify hate.
You canāt tell a child God made them in His image
and then spend the rest of their life convincing them that image is wrong.
And you definitely canāt solve societyās issues
with Sunday-only compassion.
If your love expires on Monday morningā¦
it was never faith.
It was weekend entertainment.
So maybe ā just maybe ā
itās time to stop worshiping the edited paintings
and start honoring the unedited truth.
Because when you peel back the artwork, the rewrites, and the colonial Photoshopā¦
You find something beautiful:
Humanity has always been connected.
Always learning from one another.
Always influencing one another.
Always part of the same story.
Now that is a truth worth preaching.
And yes ā itās OK to laugh while learning.
Wisdom hits even harder when the truth comes with humor.