R.L. Murrill, Psychological Practitioner

01/24/2025

Many people's most significant obstacle to taking initiative is not laziness but fear.

Some ideas will not work, and some people will say no. But in the long run, it's better to fail than to fail to try.

Inaction breeds rumination and feeds anxiety. Action builds momentum and fuels confidence.

12/14/2024

Meaning, Madness, and Addressing Burnout Triggers

Many sources of psychological literature indicate that burnout is more than just working too hard. People burn out in life because there are areas of unmet emotional needs. If you're feeling mentally and physically depleted, even when resting, it might be time to examine your life's emotional/relational aspects more closely.

Here are practical steps to recognize and address burnout triggers:

1. Evaluate Your Relationships

Strong relationships are vital for emotional well-being. Ask yourself:

Do I feel heard and understood by those around me?
Can I trust the people closest to me?
Do you think the people in my life are consistent and check in regularly?
Do my relationships feel reciprocal, or am I pouring more than I receive?
Can I speak openly without fear of judgment?
If the answers to these questions make you pause, it's worth exploring how to strengthen or reassess these connections.

2. Acknowledge Your Emotional Needs

Feeling valued and understood is essential. Look for ways to build a support network where:
You can share your thoughts and emotions freely.
There is space to ask for help without hesitation.
You feel validated and mirrored by others.
Consider joining a community or seeking professional guidance if you need help finding this in your current relationships.

3. Set Boundaries and Communicate

Healthy boundaries prevent emotional exhaustion. Make time to voice your feelings and needs:
Reach out to friends or loved ones to discuss how you're feeling.
Be clear and confident about what you need from your relationships.
Feel free to ask for time, space, or support when necessary.

4. Prioritize Reciprocity

Think about the balance in your relationships. Are others investing in you as much as you're investing in them? A reciprocal relationship fosters a sense of mutual care and belonging, which helps fight burnout.

5. Seek Professional Help if Needed

Don't hesitate to connect with a therapist or counselor if burnout persists. They can provide tools for deepening self-awareness and improving relational dynamics.
Burnout isn't just about rest or work. It is about having functional relationships that fulfill our creator's design for us and meeting the emotional needs that will fuel resilience and energy. Start small, and take steps to rebuild and nurture what matters most.

God created you for relationship and emotional health

10/27/2024

Have you ever gotten a voicemail or a message from someone important to you or with authority over you that said, "We need to talk? Please call me?" How did that feel? Did you think you had won the lottery? Or did you have some angst inside, wondering what was up or what you had done to make them angry? Depending on your life experiences, you can be anxious about a line like that.

I am a direct, to-the-point person, so I must remember that when I confront someone, I remember the anxious position in which the other person is placed. I must remember that hearing about one's faults is unpleasant and may evoke fear. Their past experience with being confronted may have been hurtful, and they may be expecting the same now. Or they bring a lot of guilt and shame to the table. So, by inviting another person to have the talk, try to make it as palatable as possible:

Although difficult conversations may be intimidating, they're often necessary to preserve peace, see change, and/or move a relationship forward. People can learn the best way to have a difficult conversation, no matter who you must address or what it's about if they seek self-knowledge and guidance on managing conflict. You can learn how to get the desired outcome from a difficult conversation.

10/24/2024

When life isn't as easy as we think it should be, sometimes people think that the walls of life are closing in on them. However, when that is what people believe, it generally comes true because people act on what they believe. Think about this: Brick walls are in front of us for a reason. They're not there to keep us out. Brick walls are present to commit to what we want to see happen. It reveals something that allows us to see something as an obstacle or an opportunity. Obstacles reveal who we are, what we are willing to believe, and how we are willing to organize priorites to see obstacle priorities become a reality. When you organize the things you need clarity about today, can you see priorities become the purpose or feel the brick wall?

09/24/2024

If you suffer from depression, anything that makes you feel has to be the most essential thing in your life because it's the only thing that can save you. Personal well-being is one of the significant struggles that people struggle with today in society, the workplace, and relationships. Where it leads to depression, feelings of worthlessness, the inability to function, and chronic anxiety. If you are reading this, keep coming back because I have good news for you; there is hope and well-being to be found.

09/18/2024

"One of the common failings among honorable people is a failure to appreciate how thoroughly dishonorable some other people can be, and how dangerous it is to trust them." Thomas Sowell

Stephen Covey reminds us, "Trust is the glue of life. It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It's the foundational principle that holds all relationships." Trust determines the level of interaction and results that can be achieved, no matter what kind of relationship you discuss. When trust has been violated, it is hard to get is back. It is not as simple as forgiving, Trust is earned through faithful acts of fidelity. Has someone violated your trust?
The process of establishing and maintaining Trust is a natural act for people who have never been been violated by those they have put their trust in to act faithfully. However, for those who have been, who feel there is no safe haven in relationship with persons they should be able to trust; there is an inability to have a effective, safe, productive relationships with others until the ability to establish trust is restablished. Trust is an essential ingredient in effective communication that may come natural to some. As such, feeling safe is a basic foundational principle in securing relationship ties in ways that create mutual fidelity and social responsibility. Everyone needs people to experience authenticity and transparency in communication without feeling a threat to a sense of self. To have honest conversations with people may seem like such a simple, obvious suggestion, but it involves courage and risk. When we can trust enough to open the door to constructive conflict in an atmosphere of Trust, commitments can be made that lead to change, accountability, and results.

09/11/2024

People respond differently to tragedies, motivated by varied factors, but God remains unchanging. Reflecting on life, an unchanging truth is to be fully present and view it through God's grace, shifting focus from problems to possibilities. Looking inward, we are reminded of God's guidance and infinite love, evident in our preservation from destruction. When dark clouds overwhelm, we become aware of God's undeserved mercy, freely given. God is fully present during tragedies, suffering alongside us, and offering a window of opportunity to witness blessings amid pain. Be grateful for the blessing of life and the chance to witness God's work as a console and guide during significant loss.

09/11/2024

08/27/2024

People create expected or unexpected outcomes by acting on what they believe to be true. Whether we recognize it or not, we do what we believe. Often, people profess to possess many deeply held beliefs but have no visible practice showing they have a plan to put them into action. There's a big difference between knowing something and doing it. People do what they think, which is the measure that creates their billboard that says, "This is my life." Life is a full-contact sport, and the score is on the board. James said, "Show me your faith, and I will show you faith by my works." What's on your scoreboard?