06/01/2025
REPRESENTATION. INCUSIVITY. POWER.
Sisu Youth Services, Oklahoma Pride Alliance, and Black Q***r Tulsa are revolutionizing Oklahoma's landscape by empowering Black and 2SLGBTQ+ individuals with the representation, inclusivity, and support they need to flourish.
On a typically hot, OKC evening in June, in an unassuming little collective/creative space on Sheridan Avenue, called Sailor and The Dock, where one could generally expect to pop in for a coffee, a cocktail, and/or perhaps a local artisan’s wares – some magic happened. Three of Oklahoma’s biggest, loudest, organizations intent on supporting the Black & 2SLGBTQ+ communities, came together with a little help from some friends & executed what had to be one of the crown jewels of OK Pride Month ’24 – The R.I.P. Ball.
Representation, Inclusivity & Power, the R.I.P. Ball, as individual notions applied to our day-to-day lives, likely receive little thought, or consideration from most of us. As a Black and/or 2SLGBTQ+ individual living in Oklahoma, however, these are concepts that impact or shape a lot about your reality. Events like R.I.P. Ball are statements to the world, that the Black & 2SLGBTQ+ Communities of Oklahoma will be represented, included, and empowered in their day-to-day lives, as well as how they engage their individual communities - and they’re on a mission to make that reality, no one can deny.
We got to catch up with Evin DeShawn Styles, who is an active Mentor to the competitors of the Ball & stood in as Emcee, this year. “I give so much energy to this, because we are them & they are us… We are here for you & we see you.”, Evin responds, when asked what his motivation for involvement in these organizations & events like R.I.P. Ball. “Many of us are facing homelessness and trying to figure out just day to day life. So, providing a space where 3 major organizations in your community have come together to provide an outlet that shows you we care… It’s so important. Especially for young Q***r individuals of Oklahoma. I faced many of the adversities these kids are facing now, even this year. So, it’s super important to me to show up & show them they aren’t alone, and we have resources.” Evin prides himself on creating these safe spaces for all to come together & experience, “But more so for all to learn & see themselves. The energy of the evening is unmatched. It’s so refreshing to see people let loose & feel comfortable doing so.”
For anyone that is unfamiliar with ‘Ball Culture’ or has no frame of reference on what happens at these events – you’re gonna need to go feel it for yourself. The pictures give you backdrop & these words can tell a story – but they pale, in comparison to the thing that is a proper Ball. This isn’t just a ‘drag show’, or some kind of pageant – it’s a full-blown riot of expression, beyond anything that you can possibly imagine (and that’s Evin’s sentiment; not ours). But for the sake of a comprehensive story, the concept of Ball Culture emerged in New York, in the ‘20s – largely consisting of drag queens, with exclusionary rules placed on Black queens - often deterring them from performing. Fed up with it over time, the Black Q***r community of New York established their own underground Ball Culture in the ‘60s. Empowered by the Stonewall Riots & the shifting of perspectives from shame in society, to pride in expression, Ball Culture evolved throughout the ‘70s - adding categories, competitive elements, and creating a community that more freely expressed themselves, authentically. Balls served as safe spaces for Black Q***r youth – empowering them to express themselves proudly and be embraced & celebrated for it. R.I.P. Ball is a quintessential continuation of that tradition, bringing together an energetic, loving, uplifting community, to celebrate Juneteenth & authentic self-expression as members and allies of the Black/2SLGBTQ+ Community of Oklahoma, which is extremely important.
Oklahoma is & has always been a staunchly conservative political space, rich with religious perspectives, with people in power having an elevated sense of pride for the way things have always been/the way they want to make things be. Members of the Black community in Oklahoma have some of the most storied – often purposefully buried – oppressive histories, in the country; and it only piles on double, when we consider the historical plight of the 2SLGBTQ+ community of Oklahoma. Having the opportunity to see yourself, be included in your authentic existence, or be empowered to shine as your authentic self, has never been the status quo for marginalized members of the community of Oklahoma (or the U.S., for that matter) – and it has been time to change that. Sisu Youth Services, Oklahoma Pride Alliance & Black Q***r Tulsa are leading that charge, in the Sooner State.
Sisu Youth Services, located at 3131 N. Pennsylvania Ave, in OKC, has been focused on holding space for the at-risk youth of OKC, for a decade now. Starting with one person’s mission to gather & share resources in the city, it quickly caught traction & mushroomed into what it is today. Offering safe shelter space, transitional living assistance, case management, life skills & education, Sisu Youth Services is “a low-barrier, identity-affirming emergency overnight shelter and drop-in resource hub for unhoused and at-risk youth across our city.” (via sisuyouth.org).
Sisu often partners up with, or works closely with the Oklahoma Pride Alliance, whose mission it is, “to foster a sense of community and belonging for Oklahoma's 2SLGBTQIA+ individuals. [By providing] resources, programming, and events that aim to educate and empower the community.” (okpridealliance.org). Using opportunities like R.I.P Ball, they bolster the vision they hold for Oklahoma’s 2SLGBTQ+ Community, where they no longer feel discrimination or prejudice & are allowed to live freely & authentically – which so seamlessly ties into how Black Q***r Tulsa showed up, to show out.
Black Q***r Tulsa (BQT) is on a mission to normalize the Black Q***r experience & they do so by organizing community events “promoting Inclusion, Awareness, Safe Spaces, & a Strong Community” (blackqueertulsa.org). BQT was founded by Tulsa native, Daniel McHenry, upon recognizing that he didn’t have community – or the right environment to grow – and realizing that he was the person he was waiting for to build it, which is what BQT has been doing for the last 5 years. Hosting events like Q***r Brunches, Open Mic Nights, and Black Gworl Drag Shows (not to mention being involved with R.I.P. Ball), BQT has given spaces & platforms for Oklahoma 2SLGBTQ+ people to shine unapologetically and find their community.
“As we are building this scene and community it never fails to amaze me of the turn out & support. I love to see my community come together and love on each other – be open to something new. From a Mentor perspective, I love seeing our kids that come to compete grow, and really learn the elements of Ballroom; from performance, to the attitude it takes to do this on & off the floor.”, Evin explains, as he tries to describe the energy around the Ball. Once the thing kicks off, there’s no stopping it & if you’re not having a good time, you might be dead. Music that will make you move, a wildly engaged crowd & an indescribable array of incredibly talented, beautiful performances, lending to fierce competition – all in the name of the at-risk youth of the community we’re a part of. It’s truly a magical spectacle, only ever properly experienced, in person.
If you’ve not had the opportunity to experience this type of magical energy, in such a loving community, the good news is: it’s only going to get easier for you to. “Our biggest hope, is that it continues to grow & grow, while also providing more confidence for conversations that will lead to better outcomes; more information for research & resources for us all.”, Evin relates, when asked about the future. He continues, “Most importantly, we’re looking for bigger ideas of how to make this community better. It doesn’t always have to be a Ball – let’s bring more ideas & creativity into community gatherings. The work will definitely continue throughout the year – this event is just one of many we’ve had this year, alone. The mission is to grow it as big & loud as possible. That way, the community becomes family. Then we all work together to bring better results to the State of Oklahoma – especially for our youth. We have so many people against us here from school districts to political & religious parties, that it can be very difficult to step out. But I want & need those beautiful individuals to voice their opinions and concerns – so we can build our community together & see that these moments of self-expression are so powerful to the upbringing of our youth, and humanity.”
Consider that your call out & formal invite to get involved in building community & contributing to the betterment of humanity – by going to a BQT sponsored runway show in Tulsa, checking out some Oklahoma Pride Alliance Q***r Pickup Games in OKC, or volunteering/donating to Sisu Youth Services. The impact these organizations & individuals like Evin have on our communities cannot be measured or overestimated. The stories shared by people that have been directly supported, empowered & celebrated through these organizations, and the community you feel enveloped by in spaces like R.I.P. Ball, are some of the purest examples of Love & Humanity available on the planet – truly magical.
Find and support everyone we were able to mention as involved in this article – then go find a few more, they’re connected to - it’s worth it:
Sisu Youth Services: sisuyouth.org & social media Sisu Youth Services
Oklahoma Pride Alliance: okpridealliance.org & social media OKC Pride Alliance
Black Q***r Tulsa: blackqueertulsa.org & social media Black Q***r Tulsa
Evin DeShawn Styles: social media & THE CREW:OKC, Mondays
Sailor & The Dock: 617 W. Sheridan Ave, OKC, OK & social media Sailor & the Dock
📝Andy Crittenden
📸 Taylor Todd
