08/02/2025
One afternoon, in my mid-eighties, I sat by the window of Balmoral, watching the rain soften the hills into mist. I was holding a letter from a woman in Sussex — a grandmother, she said, feeling “somehow lost in her own life.”
And I thought, not for the first time: We spend so many years becoming who others need us to be… that sometimes we forget who we quietly are.
You see, I wore the crown for over seventy years. I read thousands of speeches. Met world leaders, walked through crises, waved from balconies. And yet — the moments I remember most vividly are smaller.
A cup of tea with my sister after a long day.
Feeding carrots to my ponies in the snow.
A walk with Philip where we didn’t speak, but didn’t need to.
The sound of church bells on a Sunday when the world seemed to pause.
People often asked if I was ever lonely. I was — occasionally. Not for company, but for the version of myself I only met in silence.
There’s a certain kind of woman — I imagine you may be one — who carries everything: the birthdays, the burdens, the invisible schedules of everyone she loves. You hold families together with reminders and roast dinners, kind smiles and quiet sacrifice.
But I wonder: when was the last time someone asked you how you’re really doing?
I write this not as your queen, but as an older woman who has lived many lifetimes in one.
You do not have to be everything, all at once.
You are allowed to rest.
You are allowed to take up space — even if it’s only in your own heart.
Let these years ahead be your sovereign years.
Not ruled by obligation, but by choice.
Not measured by your usefulness, but by your aliveness.
Read poetry aloud.
Buy flowers just for you.
Say no when you mean it — and yes when it matters.
And above all, remember: you are not past your prime.
You are entering your reign.
With affection and understanding,
— Elizabeth R.