Waiting With You

Waiting With You Suzanne DeSelms, birth doula As a birth doula, I am never waiting on you, I am waiting with you.

I support families at births in hospitals, birth centers and at home in the greater Puget Sound area.

A new testimonial!!!!!
08/07/2021

A new testimonial!!!!!

The term "sibling doula" is one that isn't well-understood, even within the birth professional world. Many families struggle to know what to do with their older children during thier birth,...

05/30/2021

My doula friend wrote this spot-on piece about how and why it's not ok that hospitals are still using Covid as an excuse to separate pregnant people from their planned support people. This is happening at scheduled prenatal ultrasound appointments, in labor triage and during both planned and unplanned cesareans.

Especially if the support team is vaccinated there's no reason these policies should still be in place.

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This weekend’s Adeline-stirs-the-pot post:

Birthing women and families have made HUGE sacrifices for the safety of healthcare workers during COVID, many of which were unnecessary, not evidence-based, and downright abusive even before the vaccine. But now we’ve had *the most effective vaccine in history* available to medical staff since January. If your staff is not 100% vaccinated at this point, it is almost without exception because those workers are choosing to not be vaccinated. If a worker cannot be vaccinated for a health reason, there is PPE available for those workers. We also are vaccinating pregnant women, all birth partners are now eligible to be vaccinated, and most are choosing to do so. Also, we are testing people for COVID before they are admitted to the hospital, often under threat of being “treated as a person under investigation” and separation from their newborn upon birth.

And yet, from ~liberal~ Seattle to COVID-denying Texas, women are still being isolated from their chosen birth companions, being made to mask in labor (even if they are vaccinated and everyone caring for them is vaccinated), told to be induced or choose c-section because it’s somehow safer, having their doulas kept from them, etc. I’m even hearing of vaccinated homebirth midwives making CHILDREN mask in their own homes during the births of their siblings.

If your hospital, birth center, or homebirth practice is still requiring masks during labor, limits on chosen birth attendants, and other COVID-era policies, try to remember how restrictive and insane those policies felt when they were first put in place. They were justified at the time because we were told we needed to keep healthcare workers safe. Now, healthcare workers are protected by a vaccine with over 98% efficacy, but policies remain largely unchanged.

These policies are now—and probably were always—about control, not safety. End them.

03/18/2021

Prepared to be stunned at the powerful visuals of what parenting a newborn actually looks like

Northwest got a remodel! It was already a fantastic place to receive care and now its aesthetics match its policies 😊
01/29/2021

Northwest got a remodel! It was already a fantastic place to receive care and now its aesthetics match its policies 😊

If you are looking for a hospital waterbirth, Virgina Mason in Seattle now offers them!!!!!
10/22/2020

If you are looking for a hospital waterbirth, Virgina Mason in Seattle now offers them!!!!!

A new study was just released in the journal Obstetrics and Gynecology that examined the outcomes of parents and newborns who were born in the water in a hospital setting.  This is a topic that Connecting the Dots has covered before, most recently with a synopsis here and here with the expert on wa...

Post VBAC life 💓
10/17/2020

Post VBAC life 💓

I hear this language all the time and it's incredibly harmful, especially for people pleasers and/or abuse survivors.A m...
09/03/2020

I hear this language all the time and it's incredibly harmful, especially for people pleasers and/or abuse survivors.

A much better substitution is "Are you able to?" Because it leaves room for "No!"

Even deleting the "for me" off the end of these just leaves us with a set of commands. 😐

Welcome baby Mateo 😍
08/25/2020

Welcome baby Mateo 😍

Working so hard to meet a baby today 💓💓💓
08/25/2020

Working so hard to meet a baby today 💓💓💓

08/10/2020

Just a quick update on my business, I am open to take clients with November due dates and beyond so if you are pregnant and thinking about hiring a doula, now is the time to reach out.

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Everett, WA

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