09/25/2025
Update: Video coming soon. I’ll have time to edit at the airport because I’m heading to the United States for the FIRST time in nearly 5 years! Texas here I come!
As I finished with Juanitas home I felt a deep sense of gratitude. I thought a lot about her reaction with her doll.. so much that I went deep within..
Why have I not returned to North America in so many years? Why do I give away so many homes and businesses?
Maybe a few of you can relate to this.. I grew up moving 10+ times. My father in and out of work. My parents had a MUCH harder childhood than I had.. but family traumas are always passed down in many ways. Juanita and her doll taught me that I’ve been trying to build my inner child’s stable home🎇
(We’re working on saving up to build our own home in El Salvador)
Yet as I write this.. my very own family is still renting. People knock on door daily asking for money, homes, loans..
The truth is no social media influencer lives the dream they portray of a perfect life. There are struggles, pain, and YES beautiful moments.. but social media allows us to wear the greatest mask of pretending to be someone we’re not.
I asked myself this beautiful HONEST question.. if my wife leaves with our child.. how would I honestly react? I sat and meditated on that.. and what came to mind? “I’d want to burn down our farm”
That was a beautiful breakthrough.. many may not understand..
I do not need to prove to myself that I’m worthy of being loved.. nor does anyone else with social media. Showing their perfect vacations, nice homes, perfect families..
The truth is.. we are all like Juanita. A small child still craving that Doll. Abandonment. Affection. Acceptance. Love.
Pretending we have it online and if it’s true why are there so many school shootings? So much division with politics? Religion? So much vanity?
The truth is the world is filled with hurt adults passing down their pain to the next generation.
I am not an influencer
I am not MURPHSLIFE
I am not an angel
I AM a spark of the divine. An ETERNAL conscious LIVING being. A soul that has a temporal body who has the opportunity to raise my daughter Sisa. Continued in comments..