After the Tones Drop

06/08/2026

“At what point have you done enough that you earn rest?”
That question hit me harder than I wanted it to.
Because if I wouldn’t let a client run themselves into the ground and call it strength, then I don’t get to do it either.

Episode 160 is about stepping back before the wheels come off, practicing what I preach, and taking the summer to write, rest, and recover without waiting for collapse to give me permission.
Rest is not something you earn by breaking.

Listen to the full episode here:
https://www.afterthetonesdrop.co/sabbatical/

06/05/2026

Flashback to the episode because it is so important with Vickie Speed of

Every law enforcement agency in the country should hear this:

Cancer in our ranks is real. It’s not rare. It’s not “retirement age.” It’s showing up younger, hitting harder—and we’re still acting like it’s someone else’s problem.

Vickie Speed built something that works. It’s not a theory. It’s already helping departments take care of their people—without adding liability or red tape.

But we need departments to listen. To let go of denial and lean into action. Because officers deserve more than silence.

This episode matters. Not just for the families already in the storm—but for every one of us who could be.

🎧 Listen to Episode 117 of After the Tones Drop 🔗 https://www.afterthetonesdrop.co/vickie-speed

06/03/2026

Episode 160 is live, and this one is a little different.

After the Tones Drop is taking a summer sabbatical so I can write, rest, recalibrate, and remember that I am not just a clinician, podcaster, speaker, or content machine.
I am a human being.
A tired one, if we’re being honest.
This break is not because everything is falling apart. It is because I am finally learning to step back before it does.

Sometimes rest is not a rescue mission.
Sometimes it is prevention.

We will return September 2nd, in the in between catch up on past episodes. Season 3 offers incredible guests and conversations you need to hear.

Listen to Episode 160 https://www.afterthetonesdrop.co/sabbatical/

06/02/2026

Unfairness does not just annoy some nervous systems.
It activates them.

If you grew up around changing rules, selective accountability, betrayal, or power being misused, your body may have learned early that fairness equals safety. So when injustice shows up later, especially in first responder work, it can feel less like frustration and more like threat.

This is justice sensitivity.
And once you have language for it, a lot of those “why can’t I just let this go?” reactions start to make more sense.

Read the full blog here: https://www.afterthetonesdrop.co/blog/justice-sensitivity/

06/02/2026

I mean, she makes a good point…..

06/01/2026

“Surviving an incident and recovering from it are not the same thing.”

Five years ago today, on June 1, 2021, Firefighter Tory Carlon was fatally shot at Fire Station 81 in Agua Dulce, California by a co-worker.

To honor this anniversary, I’m reissuing an episode of After the Tones Drop that originally aired in February 2025 featuring Capt. Ed Monroe, who was among those immediately on scene following the shooting.

In this conversation, Captain Monroe shared his personal experience of that day, the struggles that followed, and the lessons he believes the fire service must learn if we hope to better support our people and prevent future tragedies.

Today, we remember Tory, his family, his crew, and everyone whose lives were changed that day.

In this powerful episode of After the Tones Drop , we sit down with Captain Ed Monroe, a 16-year veteran of the LA County Fire Department, whose life and leadership…

06/01/2026

When fairness equals safety, injustice does not just p**s you off.
It lights up your whole damn system.

If you grew up around changing rules, selective accountability, abuse of power, or betrayal dressed up as “that’s just how it is,” your nervous system may have learned to scan for double standards like your life depended on it.
Because at one point, it kind of did.

That radar can make you ethical, protective, and unwilling to look away. But it can also keep you exhausted, angry, and constantly braced for the next betrayal.

This is justice sensitivity. And if you work in first response, it may explain why some things hit harder than they “should.”

https://www.afterthetonesdrop.co/justice-sensitivity

05/29/2026

Flash Back to a powerful conversation with Matty Fiorenza

Still healing. Still human. Still here.

Matty Fiorenza doesn’t sugarcoat the struggle—because perfection doesn’t help people. Presence does.

He’s not preaching from a pedestal. He’s sitting shoulder-to-shoulder with the ones still in the fight.

If you’ve ever thought, “I should be further along by now,” this one’s for you.

🎧 Watch the full conversation on Episode 116 of After the Tones Drop

https://www.afterthetonesdrop.co/matty-fiorenza

05/27/2026

For some people, unfairness is annoying.
For others, it hits the nervous system like danger.

If you grew up where the rules changed, accountability was selective, blame landed wherever it was convenient, and nobody stepped in when they should have, your body may have learned early that injustice was not just frustrating.
It was threatening.

That is justice sensitivity.

And for first responders, especially those with childhood adversity, that wiring can make you fiercely ethical, protective, and mission-driven. It can also leave you exhausted, activated, and unable to “just let it go” when something feels unfair.
This episode is about what happens when fairness becomes safety, and why your reaction may make more sense than you think.

https://www.afterthetonesdrop.co/social-justice

05/26/2026

We have accepted way too many broken-family clichés in first responder culture.
The third divorce joke. The kid who stops calling. The idea that the job gets the best of you and your family gets whatever is left.

Katherine Boyle is calling bu****it on that narrative.
You can have an incredible career in law enforcement and still build a beautiful relationship with your kids. You can serve your community and still protect the childhood happening inside your own home.

Because if we wait until the kids are grown and disconnected to ask, “What happened?” we waited too damn long.

Listen to the full conversation with Katherine Boyle on After the Tones Drop: https://www.afterthetonesdrop.co/katherine-boyle