The Really Independent Florida Crocodile

The Really Independent Florida Crocodile Don't forget to visit us at http://thecrocodile.org and follow us on Twitter The University of Florida's premier news distributor. We Inform.

Don't trust those false publications that are thrown in your face daily. You Accept.

"We strive for our target atmosphere to be somewhere in between expensive eight-year-old's birthday party and budget bar...
12/01/2022

"We strive for our target atmosphere to be somewhere in between expensive eight-year-old's birthday party and budget bar mitzvah."

With the end of the semester approaching, many UF students look for a way to end their busy weeks with a lively social event where they can unwind and make new friends. Instead, GatorNights is crafting a welcoming experience for all students ages 3 and up. The weekly program was created to giv

The repair of the potato cost the university a reported $2.3 million. Un-mashing a potato is widely known as the most ex...
11/27/2022

The repair of the potato cost the university a reported $2.3 million. Un-mashing a potato is widely known as the most expensive architectural technique.

Sirens howled as they tore down 13th St. the morning after Thanksgiving. In Turlington Plaza, students flooded out of Marston basement like ants to peer in awe at the spectacle before them. The long-standing Turlington Potato had been replaced by a fluffy, steaming pile of mash. “I’m not gonna

“What I love about this is that the sweater is thick enough that my armpit and underboob sweat don’t stain the fabric!”
11/21/2022

“What I love about this is that the sweater is thick enough that my armpit and underboob sweat don’t stain the fabric!”

Fall has finally come to Gainesville! Temperatures are dropping to a chilly 78 degrees in the shade, and UF students are dressing to match. Our Gainesville community has been donning cozy flannels and trendy beanies to get into the fall spirit. The Crocodile reached out to some UF students to tal

One source reportedly obtained the recent Prime Video bill for the Fuchs residence; The Notebook was rented a total of 1...
11/10/2022

One source reportedly obtained the recent Prime Video bill for the Fuchs residence; The Notebook was rented a total of 11 times in the past month.

A blue mohawk, a lip piercing, and a fresh septum. These likely aren’t the three things that come to mind when one thinks of long-time UF President Kent W. Fuchs. Yet, the rumors are true: upon cutting ties with the University of Florida, President Fuchs has entered his breakup era. Here at The C

“I mean, GOD! What if she’d swallowed it?”
11/09/2022

“I mean, GOD! What if she’d swallowed it?”

While the rest of us spend Halloween with family and friends, enjoying tricks and treats, some lurk in the shadows, intent on ruining the innocent fun of a silly holiday. Nobody can be sure just how monsters like this are created, but sadly, they exist even when we least expect it. And this year, th

"Kendra once gave her marigolds some soup from Broward Dining. The death was quick, so luckily it didn't suffer much."
10/19/2022

"Kendra once gave her marigolds some soup from Broward Dining. The death was quick, so luckily it didn't suffer much."

A local coleus was selected from a UF plant drop, blissfully unaware that being handled by exploratory freshman Kendra Cotton is synonymous with certain death. The windowsill of Cotton’s room, located on the third floor of Jennings Hall, is decorated with a drowned succulent, the flaking brown

"The Krishna Lunch is the pillar of the Gainesville economy!" - Dr. Howard, head of financial management at UF.
10/13/2022

"The Krishna Lunch is the pillar of the Gainesville economy!" - Dr. Howard, head of financial management at UF.

The city of Gainesville has been consumed by a frenzy of unemployment, inflation and rising store prices after Krishna lunch ruled out free refills last fall. “They’ve made fools out of both us and our hard-earned money!” wrote Brian Shelby, a business student. “What’s my $5 worth, if not ...

"I like ordering the veggie patty with no toppings. The bland monotony reminds me of my life."
10/12/2022

"I like ordering the veggie patty with no toppings. The bland monotony reminds me of my life."

A geology sophomore was recently spotted at the Rawlings Subway, the saddest Subway of them all, a full five days in a row. “I like ordering the veggie patty with no toppings. The bland monotony reminds me of my life,” Said the student in question, Kathleen Path. Research studies by the un

"He described his goals for the president, referring to them on more than one occasion as his Master Plan."
10/11/2022

"He described his goals for the president, referring to them on more than one occasion as his Master Plan."

Yesterday morning, the football stadium was ablaze in orange and blue colors as fans cheered and music played. Suddenly, silence fell as the stadium screens appeared to be hacked by a speaker wishing to address the university. The speech came as quite a shock, as one of the most anticipated days of

“It’s refreshing to see UF finally treat us like we’re adults. It’s my health, my responsibility.”
11/08/2021

“It’s refreshing to see UF finally treat us like we’re adults. It’s my health, my responsibility.”

In the interest of protecting the health and welfare of students, UF Health has implemented a new protocol for validating data gathered by Screen, Test & Protect. All students will now be required to verify their Covid-19 status with a pinky swear. “Students and staff alike are expected to ho

"It was everything you’ve ever wanted in a wheel, and more. It was just better."
11/05/2021

"It was everything you’ve ever wanted in a wheel, and more. It was just better."

Sophomore engineering students Cody Sinclair and Marc Thompkins have broken ground with a brand-new invention. “You know the saying, ‘Don’t reinvent the wheel,’” stated Sinclair. “Well, in this case, we did, and then we made it better. We call it New Wheel.” The pair unveiled New Wheel

"One-third of freshman students were reportedly down with food poisoning for 6 days following the event. "
11/04/2021

"One-third of freshman students were reportedly down with food poisoning for 6 days following the event. "

“Hashtag fresh!” yelled a beaming board member outside the doors of Broward Dining Hall last week. “More like for YUM page!” A new meal plan initiative was launched this month, patented “TikTok Tuesday.” It promises to serve up the “favorite viral creations” of today’s youth. Week ...

Address

Gainesville, FL

Website

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when The Really Independent Florida Crocodile posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Shortcuts

Share

Category