Darts Magazine

01/06/2026

Cosmic Darts. 🪐✨👽👾

12/30/2025

We’ll be shooting darts at Unihog tomorrow. Bring your team. Bring yourself. Bring a childlike sense of wonder. No buy ins, just good old fashioned five on five team darts. The illustrious Unihog will be putting some tacos out for us shooters and it’s bound to be a good time founded on community and friendship. That’s kind of what happens there so no surprises. Hope to see ya there!

🎯

12/16/2025

This is Darts Magazine, a publication to represent the world today.
Nonsensical, in poor taste and completely devoid of meaning.
Dear reader, no one is more “butt hurt” about this sad state of affairs than me, Editor in Chief and sole Reporter for this burning donkey turd of a magazine.

What went wrong?

Did bro low key fall off?

Probably an undiagnosed traumatic brain injury, but who am I to guess, I’m no fake doctor. But that does give me an idea…

We reached out to Darts Magazine founder Brian Gardner for comment and he had this to say, “C’mon man it’s not complicated just like say your team has the best beards in darts. Also, you gotta stop tagging me in these fake interviews. This is your thing now man. Washing my hands of the whole thing.”

Hmmm much to ponder on.

While many questions remained unasked and unanswered, we do know this… I still have this Facebook account.

And at the end of the day isn’t that what’s important, what you make pretend to be.

So I guess we’ll keep on chasing that mirage, and hey, who knows, maybe we’ll find some forgotten oasis. Not because we deserve it, not because we earned it, just dumb luck.

This is Darts Magazine. A whisper in the dark.

🎯

12/09/2025

12/02/2025

I don’t gotta tell you who this guy is. One of the best high kicks in the league. Ranked 18th in the nation at his age and weight bracket.
When you see Jamey Slick tonight wish him the happiest of birthdays. Love ya bud.

Let’s go Darts! 🎯