06/29/2025
Editing a video the other day I stopped in my tracks.
I still see myself as the picture on the left. Seeing me on the right, the one I’ve been working hard for? The one I’ve been fighting for? I FEEL her, but I still see the girl on the left.
The girl on the left was depressed. She was in the deepest part of depression. She didn’t know what was going to happen next. She didn’t know how she could keep going on. She stopped all hobbies. She stopped seeing friends. She stopped visiting family. She dread waking in the morning and looked forward to going back to sleep.
The girl on the right? She puts herself first. Maybe not first because she’s a mom (IYKYK) but she’s up there. She got her mental health in order from seeking help. She NEVER stopped advocating for her kids and pushed for answers and help. She got herself in the gym. She stopped eating absolute garbage all day every day. She doesn’t dread waking up anymore. She gets up with a smile on her face. She has the mental capacity to give her kids love and patience instead of just rage.
When I saw myself through the video, I couldn’t help but pause and be so proud of myself for how far I’ve come. If it wasn’t for my boys, I can’t say for sure that I’d still be here. So I have them to thank and owe them my life.
These pictures are almost exactly one year apart. In the exact same shirt. The amount of growth I have experienced, and the amount of peace I have found is something I could never explain.
I’m proud of myself. ♥️