99.9 the Q

12/29/2025

Nina in Barnstable writes:

I’m the “responsible” sibling in my family. I have a sister who is always in some kind of crisis — broken relationships, money problems, job stress — and my parents are constantly stepping in to help her. I’ve always been told I’m strong, capable, and that I’ll land on my feet.Recently, my house needed a major repair after my furnace died. It’s not something I can put off, and paying for it means taking out a loan I really don’t want. My parents could help me cover it so I wouldn’t have to take on debt, but they told me they didn’t feel comfortable doing that.
The reason? They’re already helping my sister again. This time it’s not life-or-death — it’s things like covering a few months of her rent and helping her get caught up after another rough breakup. Their explanation to me was, “You’re strong. You’ll figure it out. Your sister really needs us right now.” I can’t stop thinking about it. I don’t want my parents to choose between us, but it hurts knowing that my real, practical emergency isn’t considered as urgent because I’m the one who usually handles things without falling apart.

So now I don’t know what to do. Do ask again and risk sounding resentful? Or do I accept that this is the role I’ve been given in my family and know I’m on my own?

12/26/2025

12/26/2025

Emily sits next to a coworker whose desk is extremely cluttered — stacks of paperwork, folders piled like Jenga, and enough snacks to survive a long winter. Nothing dirty or unsanitary, just total visual chaos contained inside her cube.

Emily keeps a calm, minimalist workspace and finds the constant mess next door genuinely distracting. She’s tried making light jokes and casual hints about cleaning or refreshing the space, but her coworker laughs it off and changes nothing.

Now Emily’s stuck wondering:
Is this a “mind your own business” situation?
Is it reasonable to want visual order in a shared workspace?
And since subtle hints didn’t work would it be out of line to mention it to their boss, or should she just accept defeat and stare at the wall for the rest of her career?

12/24/2025

Owen Marcus from MELD explains how past trauma can resurface this time of year and how to cope with it.

12/23/2025

“Lila” in Plymouth writes

I’m dating a genuinely great guy, he’s kind, consistent, emotionally available, adored by everyone. On paper, he’s perfect. So why am I bored?

There’s no drama (good), but also no spark (less good). Our conversations feel predictable, our dates feel routine, and I’m oddly more excited about my alone time than seeing him. Is this just what a healthy relationship feels like after years of chaos, or is something important missing?

Do I stay for stability, or leave even though nothing is wrong?

12/23/2025

Is it as bad as everyone claims?

12/23/2025

Tuesday’s Tail from the MSPCA Cape Cod is Kirby the cat:

Meet Kirby! This handsome fella came to us as a stray, so his past is a bit of a mystery. While in our care he has been worried and sweet, so we’re going slow and letting him set the pace of how fast he comes out of his shell. With a gentle approach and snacks in hand, he’s sure to come around and show his social side!
Kirby has tested positive for Feline Immunodeficiency Virus (FIV), a bloodborne illness in cats that may weaken their immune system over time. Some cats with FIV may not show symptoms, but it will be important to establish ongoing care with a vet after adoption to ensure that this kiddo is feeling his best.

Stop by our Cape Cod Adoption Center to meet Kirby – FIV+. We have open adoption hours Tuesday-Sunday from 1pm-4pm - no appointment needed to speak to a staff person regarding available pets.

You are welcome to enter our cat rooms during open hours. Staff and volunteers will be happy to assist you!

12/22/2025

Carrie and Glen spent Thanksgiving with her side of the family, which they usually do since his family lives far away. The issue is that her family constantly makes jokes at his expense about his job, his habits, even how he eats and everyone brushes it off as “just how they are.”

He says the jokes aren’t the biggest problem; it’s that his wife never steps in. She stays quiet, changes the subject, or later tells him not to take it so personally. To him, that feels like choosing comfort over loyalty.

Her perspective: she hates confrontation, her family has always joked like this, and speaking up would only make things awkward or worse. She worries defending him would turn every visit into a fight.

So the question is: does loyalty mean stepping in even when it’s uncomfortable for your spouse? Or is it reasonable to expect a partner to brush off family behavior you can’t realistically change? Is choosing not to attend anymore a fair boundary, or an overreaction?

12/22/2025

Cool moments and Chatham Bars Inn today..