99.9 the Q

12/14/2025

Nicky from Falmouth writes:
“I was with my boyfriend for five years. It was mostly a good relationship, but he was emotionally closed off and never wanted to fully commit. That’s ultimately why he ended things.

It’s been two years, I’ve finally healed and moved on, and now he’s reached back out. He says he’s been in therapy, understands how unavailable he was, and takes responsibility for hurting me. He insists he’s different now and says he’s finally open to commitment.

So here’s what I’m wrestling with:
If someone really does change, do they deserve another chance — or is it a mistake to reopen a relationship that already broke your heart?”

12/12/2025

12/11/2025

Emme in Wareham writes:

My daughter’s best friend has a really sweet mom — I honestly like her! — but every time I do pick-up or drop-off, she traps me by the garage and suddenly I’m hearing everything about her marriage, her money stress, her childhood trauma, her dog’s digestive issues… all of it.

We’re not close, so it feels a little weird knowing more about her personal life than some of my own family. I want to be polite, and I definitely don’t want to mess with the girls’ friendship, but I also don’t want to be her unofficial therapist every afternoon.

How do I gently shut down the oversharing without hurting her feelings or creating super awkward “avoiding each other behind the minivan” vibes?

12/11/2025

Coming up ...

12/10/2025

Jen in Hyannis writes:
I went back home to California for Thanksgiving to visit my family. I hadn’t been home since last Christmas, so this was the first time anyone had seen me in almost a year. I’ve lost 80 pounds, and at our big family gathering with relatives and friends, people were incredibly kind and complimentary. I was really proud of how far I’ve come.

But every time someone said something nice, my sister immediately jumped in with, “Well, she’s on Ozempic,” as if she needed to explain my weight loss or take the credit away from my effort. It felt humiliating. My health choices aren’t her business to announce, and Ozempic doesn’t magically do all the work — I’ve completely changed how I eat and I’ve been working out consistently. I ended up feeling like she was diminishing everything I’ve accomplished.

Do I confront her about this, or let it slide and accept that she may always downplay what I do? I want to get ahead of this before my Christmas visit if that’s what I should do..

12/10/2025

Talking today about...

12/10/2025

12/09/2025

“Mia” in Provincetown writes:

After my grandmother passed away, I inherited a significant amount of money. It still feels emotional, and I’ve been careful not to make any rushed decisions.

My husband and I have always shared household expenses while each remaining responsible for our own personal debts. That arrangement has worked well for us.

Since the inheritance, he’s suggested using some of this money to pay off his debts, like his student loans and personal credit cards. He is saying that marriage means being a team. I feel conflicted. I don’t want to be selfish, but this money feels different as it’s tied to a loss and doesn’t feel like part of our shared finances in the same way our income is. Who is right?

12/09/2025

Today ...