
09/08/2025
🚨 WANTED: For Crimes Against Frowns 🚨
Reward: $10,000 (or unlimited smiles 😏)
Charges include:
😆 Excessive grinning in public
💥 Boosting confidence without a license
🫶 Spreading contagious happiness across state lines
If spotted, don’t approach… instead, take a selfie and tag us.