Bates Natural Blessings

06/18/2026

Things your midwife says in labor and what you actually hear:

"Just breathe through it. Blow out like you're blowing out a candle."

(Said while the baby is actively crowning. I am attempting to blow out a candle while what feels like a watermelon is exiting my bu****le. Breathing is not currently available to me.)

"Drop your shoulders and let everything from your head to your toes just loosen up."

(My insides are currently being squeezed in a mechanical vice. But sure. I'll just loosen up.)

"You're safe and you're doing such a great job."

(I am in fact not doing a great job. I am fairly certain I am dying. These feel like different things.)

"You CAN do this. You're almost there and the only way out now is through."

(At this point I have no choice. That's not encouragement, that's just math. And honestly? A little brutal.)

"This looks like early labor. The best thing you can do right now is rest."

(Said as my midwife tucked me into my own bed and handed me sleepy herbs. I'm sorry. EARLY? This cannot be early. I refuse to accept early. Early is not possible right now.)

"You really need to try and eat something to keep your energy up for pushing."

(The thought of eating anything ever again is offensive to me. I have decided this baby is never coming out and food is no longer part of my life.)

"Why don't you snuggle up with your husband and get some oxytocin flowing to help pick up those contractions?"

(Ma'am. Have you seen me? I am a sweaty, leaking, enormous human who currently feels the opposite of romantic. My husband is also a little scared of me right now. Snuggling is not on the table.)

"Your body was made for this."

(Cool. My body and I are having a serious conversation after this is over.)

"Every contraction is bringing your baby closer."

(This is technically true and also completely unhelpful right now.)

"You're almost there."

(You have said this four times in the last two hours. We need to discuss what almost means.)

And then the baby arrives.

And suddenly every single thing we said was true.

You were safe. You did do a great job. You could do it. You were almost there.

Your body WAS made for this.

And it was worth every single second.

06/18/2026

06/14/2026

Women giving birth in the United States are more likely to die than police officers are in the line of duty. And unlike police fatalities, which have hit an 80-year low, maternal mortality has more than doubled since the 1980s. That means a woman today is more likely to die in childbirth than her grandmother was. This is in a country that spends more on healthcare than anywhere else on earth.

For a nation that prides itself on medical innovation, cutting edge technology, and world class hospitals, that statistic is difficult to reconcile. Most people assume that maternal health outcomes naturally improve with time. After all, medicine advances, technology improves, and healthcare spending increases. The expectation is that childbirth should become safer with each generation, not more dangerous.

Yet the reality is that many women enter pregnancy and childbirth facing risks that are often overlooked until tragedy occurs. Discussions about pregnancy frequently focus on baby showers, gender reveals, nursery decorations, and birth plans, while conversations about maternal health risks receive far less attention. The result is that many people are shocked to learn how serious pregnancy and childbirth can be, even in a wealthy country.

What’s especially troubling is that maternal mortality is not distributed evenly. Significant disparities exist across income levels, geographic regions, and racial groups, raising difficult questions about access to care, quality of treatment, and the broader healthcare system. The issue is not simply about medicine. It’s also about policy, infrastructure, education, and whether women are receiving the support they need before, during, and after pregnancy.

Pregnancy is often described as natural, but natural does not mean risk free. Throughout history, childbirth has been one of the most dangerous experiences many women face. Modern medicine dramatically reduced those risks, but progress is not something that can be taken for granted. When outcomes begin moving in the wrong direction, it deserves serious attention.

The fact that a woman today can be more likely to die during pregnancy or childbirth than women in previous generations challenges the common assumption that advancement is inevitable. It forces a larger conversation about what healthcare spending is actually accomplishing and whether resources are reaching the people who need them most.

A society reveals its priorities through the outcomes it produces. When one of the most common and fundamental human experiences carries increasing risks despite unprecedented medical spending, it raises questions that go far beyond healthcare statistics. It becomes a question about whose well-being is being protected, whose concerns are being heard, and what kind of future we are building for the generations that come next.

06/09/2026

yourwholebaby.org

06/08/2026

I love it!!!!

06/07/2026

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