Moments with Matthew

Moments with Matthew Welcome to Moments with Matthew. I am hoping to bring light and positivity into our lives so we can

I am so tired of hatefulness. There are no arguments with the hateful wing of the . They’ve proven they don’t deserve th...
06/14/2023

I am so tired of hatefulness. There are no arguments with the hateful wing of the . They’ve proven they don’t deserve that respect.

Socially conscious members of the party are always welcome here.

Someone recently told me that they couldn’t reconcile the guy in the last picture with who I am in real life. They said,...
06/06/2023

Someone recently told me that they couldn’t reconcile the guy in the last picture with who I am in real life. They said, the guy in the tie is too stuffy looking to be you.

I’ve always prided myself on dancing to the drum of my own beat. 🥁 So, I really took that comment to heart. I reflected and felt they were right. I am quirky and eccentric and loud and colorful (physically, mentally, and emotionally). Yet, I’ve always hidden my light in “Professional settings.” That was until about 5 years ago, when I said, “hiding who I am is now added to my Murtaugh List (I’m too old for that s**t).

So, now, I’m here to remind you, being professional isn’t about what you wear or how serious you are when you show up to work. Being professional is about showing up as your authentic self and doing the best damn job you can. The proof will be in the work you create and the relationships you build with those you work with. We can’t create inclusion and belong if we aren’t willing to be our true selves. We must model what we believe. And I believe professionalism is diverse and authentic. Never stuffy and rigid.

We flew to Las Vegas and got married surrounded by family and friends. Our friends volunteered their gorgeous backyard a...
06/05/2023

We flew to Las Vegas and got married surrounded by family and friends. Our friends volunteered their gorgeous backyard and the ceremony was PERFECTION!

We are a q***r and trans couple. Our marriage is an act of love and celebration. It is also an act of resistance. We chose to marry in Las Vegas because we don’t trust our home state of Florida to honor and respect our marriage. When we return we will continue to fight for our right against those hell bent on dehumanizing and othering us.

What a brilliant thoughtful take on what we consider “nonsense” or “bull$hit” or “fake news.” We rise against is if it d...
05/21/2023

What a brilliant thoughtful take on what we consider “nonsense” or “bull$hit” or “fake news.” We rise against is if it doesn’t fit our limited knowledge and understanding. It only remains nonsense until we get curious, explore, reflect, and grow then the nonsense can become something we understand.

Let’s get curious!

From Gary Zukov’s masterpiece The Dancing Wu Li Masters.

I am going through a myriad of emotions about the laws just signed by the governor of Florida. Those of us on the ground...
05/17/2023

I am going through a myriad of emotions about the laws just signed by the governor of Florida. Those of us on the ground here, who are working to ensure diversity and inclusion and now physical and emotional safety of those being directly and indirectly attacked by the Republican culture war are already exhausted. That exhaustion will not stop us. We will continue to fight against racist, bigoted, transphobic, homophobic, and any other hateful laws put forward by this evil slate of laws.

And I’m sure this was purposefully done on the International Day Against Homophobia, Transphobia, and Biophobia. The level of cruelty is not lost on us. Neither are the photos of DeSantis surrounded by children, white people, and people of color as he signs a bill that dehumanizes an entire minority group. All of this done inside of a church that clearly hasn’t learned the lessons of love that Christ taught.

We also know exactly what this is, distraction politics. Florida is one of the lowest ranking states in the country for education, insurance, housing, homelessness, unemployment benefits, healthcare, and every other major indicator of success in a first world nation.

We are being lied to and manipulated by a group of people that care nothing for their constituents and the lives they destroy.

We deserve better. We will continue to fight this hatred.

Working in the DEIA space at several different organizations in a variety of capacities, I am excited to help build and ...
05/01/2023

Working in the DEIA space at several different organizations in a variety of capacities, I am excited to help build and grow a brand new DEIA program at the Orange County Library System. It is my honor to serve the staff, customers, and community of OCLS. Together we will create and embody the change needed to be inclusive so that all may belong.

These hate groups that disguise themselves as arbiters of moral and social values aren’t even trying to disguise their d...
03/09/2023

These hate groups that disguise themselves as arbiters of moral and social values aren’t even trying to disguise their disgust for anyone who doesn’t look, sound, and act just like them. They don’t want LGBTQIA humans to live their own authentic lives surrounded by love and acceptance. They don’t want BIPOC humans to share their stories and their histories. And they certainly don’t want to be reminded of the systemic racism and bias that allows them to ignorantly move through their privileged lives and ensuring their superiority.

DeSantis and Moms Liberty aren’t protecting children, they’re sowing hate. They are flagrantly flaunting their ability to control and manipulate the law to pass legislation that in fact harms children, harms BIPOC humans, harms LGBTQIA humans.

When leaders and their sycophants are allowed to pass laws that strip citizens of their rights, freedoms, and dignity, you are witnessing a democracy in peril. The dehumanization of minorities is only the beginning.

“First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out - because I was not a Socialist. Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out - because I was not a Trade Unionist. Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out - because I was not a Jew. Then they came for me - and there was no one left to speak for me.” -Martin Niemöller

The comparison isn’t hyperbole, the comparison is accurate. When will you speak up?

Feedback may never come easily to you as a leader, but it can be less stressful when you’ve cultivated a genuine compass...
03/08/2023

Feedback may never come easily to you as a leader, but it can be less stressful when you’ve cultivated a genuine compassionate relationship with your team. It cannot be half a$$ed attempts that are few and far between. It has to be a daily concerted effort to get to know them. Relationship building and strengthening should be your most essential job priority.

Then, when the time comes for feedback, you have a long history of showing your care and compassion for your staff. They may not love it in the moment, but they will understand it’s best for their growth.

Don’t be afraid of feedback or an employee’s reaction. Use it as a way to build a dialog and ensure growth for you and your team.

Leaders prioritize their relationships. They are not afraid to give honest growth minded feedback. They reflect on feedb...
03/01/2023

Leaders prioritize their relationships. They are not afraid to give honest growth minded feedback. They reflect on feedback they are given from their team.

Your relationships matter. They should be the majority of your effort as a leader. This is how you earn the trust and loyalty of your team. Build strong relationships and follow through on your promises. Be the leader you always needed.

It is not your job to question someone’s name or pronoun preference. It is not your job to question someone’s gender ide...
02/25/2023

It is not your job to question someone’s name or pronoun preference. It is not your job to question someone’s gender identity. It is not your place to question someone’s beliefs. It is not your job to question actual historical facts that you “disagree” with. It is not your place to work day in and day out to take rights away from Americans. It is your job to be respectful and compassionate to every human being. If you can’t do that, then sit there with your mouth closed and your opinions to yourself.

Leadership must support DEIAB fully if it is to be successful. It must become part of the fabric of the organization. It...
02/21/2023

Leadership must support DEIAB fully if it is to be successful. It must become part of the fabric of the organization. It is not enough to pay it lip service with no real engagement. Leaders must walk the talk and live what they espouse.

Your top employees will notice any disingenuous attempts to champion DEIAB. You have to live it, breathe it, share it, champion it, and show, through every decision you make, that Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, Accessibility, and Belonging are in your DNA.

It is imperative that organizations and their leaders understand that DEIAB is not a one and done action. It is a dedica...
02/14/2023

It is imperative that organizations and their leaders understand that DEIAB is not a one and done action. It is a dedicated lens that all aspects of the organization should be viewed from. Are we diverse in our hiring? Are we inclusive in our processes and policies? Is our criteria for outstanding performance equitable? Do we allow all stakeholders, staff, leadership, customers, and community members access to what they need? Does everyone feel like they belong?

We must always look through our DEIAB lens. When a leader conducts a 1on1, gives an evaluation, changes a policy, gives feedback or coaching, they must analyze each step through their DEIAB lens. It is beneficial to the organization as a whole and allows the leader to build strong lasting relationships.

Polish off your DEIAB lens and firmly place it so you can begin viewing your world through it.

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