AndyMorris

AndyMorris Musician

bill was $12 i gave the waitress $100 and she said “do you need change back”… sweetheart stop playing with me like be fr
04/10/2026

bill was $12 i gave the waitress $100 and she said “do you need change back”… sweetheart stop playing with me like be fr

i was outside walking my sister’s dog and this man asked for my number i said no… seconds later he drives past in a lamb...
04/10/2026

i was outside walking my sister’s dog and this man asked for my number i said no… seconds later he drives past in a lamborghini and tries again 😭 mf this is not a skit STILL no

being in a rich person’s house is so stressful like why can’t i find the trash
04/10/2026

being in a rich person’s house is so stressful like why can’t i find the trash

just saw a mom trying to get her toddler off the ground saying “please stand up”… then she said “will the real slim shad...
04/10/2026

just saw a mom trying to get her toddler off the ground saying “please stand up”… then she said “will the real slim shady please stand up” and the kid actually listened 😭

i got a write up today at work but not fired wtf am i supposed to do with this piece of paper mail it to my mommy 😭
04/10/2026

i got a write up today at work but not fired wtf am i supposed to do with this piece of paper mail it to my mommy 😭

when gas was $2.05 i used to drive around to clear my mind… now these thoughts live with me
04/10/2026

when gas was $2.05 i used to drive around to clear my mind… now these thoughts live with me

"If everybody is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking."
04/08/2026

"If everybody is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking."

Work hard.Really hard.Because a man without money is hardly loved and respected.A man without money is loved only by his...
03/31/2026

Work hard.
Really hard.
Because a man without money is hardly loved and respected.
A man without money is loved only by his mom.

Men can stay up until 2 AM, wake up at 6, be in debt, broke, alone, and still have faith that one day,Everything will wo...
03/31/2026

Men can stay up until 2 AM, wake up at 6, be in debt, broke, alone, and still have faith that one day,
Everything will workout.

03/31/2026

Say after me: I own more assets and avoid liabilities this April.

Major cheat code in life:Ask for the big, unreasonable things. The universe doesn't have a limit, and it meets you at yo...
03/31/2026

Major cheat code in life:
Ask for the big, unreasonable things. The universe doesn't have a limit, and it meets you at your level of audacity.

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