01/13/2026
When I left for University in September 1998, I picked a fork from my parents' cutlery drawer (the one on the left) and it was the only fork I ate with. Every meal for three years of University.
Then when I graduated, I moved into a shared house in 2001 and carried on using the same fork because I'd grown to like it and it reminded me of home.
In fact, as I wash it up yet again, I just realised that I've more or less used just one fork since 1998, despite getting married, buying a house and having a whole canteen of swanky German cutlery to choose from.
Recently, my 6 year old daughter wanted to use my fork and so I looked for an identical one for her, so we could be fork buddies. Google Image search soon told me it was a pattern called Mosaic by Viners, but all the forks I was finding were not as pleasing as my favourite one. They were rounder, seemed shorter and didn't have the distinctive longer slot in the middle, or the majestic straight tines.
A bit more searching reveals that for the last 27 years I've been eating every meal with a FISH FORK!! I don't even like fish! Occasionally, I may have a tuna sandwich (which I obviously don't eat with my fork) but other than that I don't touch the stuff. This must be the most used and least fishy fish fork in the history of forks.
Back to the picture - I've included my daughter's new fork (she does eat fish) in the middle and a banana for scale, on the right. I'm hoping she will also grow to love her Viners fork and use it above all other cutlery. I've also bought her a knife and spoon in the same pattern, as I'm a good parent.
(46 year old male, British, size 42 shoes, unless they're trainers)