Paul Cram

Paul Cram If you like stories that are a mix of tender, spooky, and deeply human, you’ve found your corner. I’m Paul Cram—actor, book lover, and scent nerd.

I make films, tell essays & odd little tales. Keeping you company with thoughts and tales each week.

This morning our book club discussed "I Must Resist: Bayard Rustin's Life in Letters", our June Pride Month selection an...
06/13/2026

This morning our book club discussed "I Must Resist: Bayard Rustin's Life in Letters", our June Pride Month selection and the winner of the 2013 Lambda Literary Award for LGBTQ+ Nonfiction.

After reading it, we could all see why it won.

The book is nearly 500 pages of Bayard Rustin's letters, spanning decades of his life, activism, and work for civil rights. The sheer amount of history contained in these pages is staggering. Gathering, preserving, and organizing hundreds of letters into a coherent narrative is an achievement in itself, and the result is a remarkable testament to Rustin's life, legacy, and impact as both a civil rights leader and a q***r man.

I'll admit—not all of us made it through this particular tome. But that didn't stop us from having one of the most thoughtful and engaging discussions we've had in a long time. My heart is full after spending the morning talking with fellow men about history, justice, identity, and the people who helped shape the world we live in today.

And then there was a "small" act of kindness that meant a lot to us.

One of our members' wives baked rainbow cupcakes from scratch for the group to wish us a Happy Pride.
It was such a simple gesture, but there is love in that. There is care in taking the time to make something and share it with others.

Happy Pride, everyone. 🌈📚

Nearly summer
05/18/2026

Nearly summer

05/15/2026

Making Room at the Table | A Message to Christian Families with Q***r Loved Ones | 🍬 Soul Snack

05/14/2026

Making Room at the Table | A Message to Christian Families with Q***r Loved Ones - Podcast Snippet
***r

05/10/2026

A Hookup, a Rugby Player, and the Shame Script I’m Unlearning

New podcast episode: What a Buck-Naked Rugby Player Taught Me About Anxiety and Self-Regard | 🍬 Soul Snack

There’s something beautiful about sitting by the lake with a group of men talking about books, prisons, mothers, lonelin...
05/09/2026

There’s something beautiful about sitting by the lake with a group of men talking about books, prisons, mothers, loneliness, communication, and human dignity… and then five minutes later making dumb jokes.

Today Men-Who-Read discussed Running the Books: The Adventures of an Accidental Prison Librarian by Avi Steinberg, and overall we were glad we read it. Steinberg writes in these vivid little mini-essays and observations that pull you into prison life in unexpected ways. I especially kept thinking about “kites” (notes inmates leave for each other hidden in books) and “sky writing,” where inmates communicate across windows through full-body gestures and improvised charades. Human beings will always find ways to reach each other.

Some of the stories left me pondering too. They were compelling, heartbreaking, deeply human… but they also weren’t always his stories to tell. I’m still sitting with where I land on that tension.

What I do know is this: I value these men and what we’re building together. A real third space. A place to think out loud. To disagree kindly. To laugh. To be thoughtful. To practice being men in the best ways we know how. To grapple with our beliefs, our experiences, and to witness one another.

And with Mother’s Day coming up, I found myself grateful my mom raised me around books and libraries in the first place.

Anyway. We sat by the lake. We talked about deep things and not-so-deep things. It was a good day.

Join us sometime if you’d like:
meetup.com/men-who-read

Being chosen in clarity hits different. (Swipe)
03/22/2026

Being chosen in clarity hits different.
(Swipe)

📚 Turns out a room full of men discussing ancient goddess worship makes for a surprisingly lively book club.This past Sa...
03/15/2026

📚 Turns out a room full of men discussing ancient goddess worship makes for a surprisingly lively book club.

This past Saturday our Men-Who-Read book club tackled When God Was a Woman by Merlin Stone for Women’s History Month.

And I’ll be honest—I did not expect the conversation to get quite as lively as it did.

The book looks at women’s roles in early religion and history, and it opened the door to a really thoughtful discussion. For some of us who grew up in pretty conservative or fundamentalist religious environments, parts of it hit a deeper emotional chord than we expected.

And as always with this group, everyone brought their own perspective to the table… which is where the conversation gets interesting.

Meanwhile, the atheist in the room basically shrugged and said, “Huh. Interesting history.”
I’ll admit… I’m a little jealous of that level of emotional detachment. 😅

The book was written in the 1970s, and sure—not every claim is beyond debate. But clearly it still has the power to get people thinking, comparing notes on their backgrounds, and having the kind of conversations you don’t usually stumble into over coffee.

Which, frankly, is kind of the whole point of a book club.

👉 If you enjoy books that nudge you to think a little differently—and conversations that get thoughtful, curious, and occasionally surprising—come check out Men-Who-Read.

Sometimes the best books are the ones that make you pause and go, “Huh… I hadn’t thought about it that way before.”

This work feels less like healing and more like walking back into a fog covered forest.You hear things before you see th...
03/01/2026

This work feels less like healing and more like walking back into a fog covered forest.

You hear things before you see them. Old echoes. Shapes just beyond your sight.

And you walk in anyway.

Because eventually you realize the things in the woods are not monsters.

Some are emotions you never got to lay down. Heavy. Present. Walking beside you.

Some are the armor you built when you were too young to have to be that strong. A warrior formed before you ever volunteered for war.

You realize you cannot kill them.
You cannot pray them away.

The emotions can feel overwhelming. They are not trying to destroy you.
The shadow is not evil. Part of it is a former warrior.

It learned to stay sharp. To brace. To strike when it believed you were under threat. It carried you through a war you should not have had to fight.

It also carries fierceness. Instinct. Power. Strength that had to grow up too fast.

Now the work is not slaying it.
The work is teaching it the war is over.

That is slow.
That is mo*********ng painful.
And I could not do it alone.

I am not polished. I am not finished. I still get scared in the woods sometimes.

But I am not running anymore. I am walking.

If you have parts of you that feel too intense, too sharp, too much… maybe they are not broken.
Maybe they survived something real.

That is the work.

02/20/2026

Who Told You Wanting Joy Was a Sin?

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