05/16/2026
Enough have asked me about it that I thought it was time I officially say… yes, I am back in St. Louis, and yes, it’s for GOOD.
I don’t really have quite the right words to explain what led me back or exactly how I feel about it, but I’m not a woman of few words, so I’ll certainly try anyway.
I set off to Charleston with a dream I had held for as long as I could remember — I wanted to experience life outside of the city I was born and raised in. It’s been the most difficult feeling to explain to others but the feeling was hard to ignore. It didn’t have to be Charleston, but I’m glad it was. Charleston welcomed me with open arms. I made so many friends and connections and was given so many opportunities that I truly felt like the luckiest girl in the world. But I quickly realized something was still missing.
I have only ever known a life of forced independence, so the idea of being on my own in a new city as a single mom never really intimidated me. But here’s the thing — life is loud if you listen to her. I’ve gotten really good at taking cues and shifting my sails. I realized I created this island for myself & simply didn’t want to be alone anymore.
A small (very small) part of me felt embarrassed. Like I was wrong, like it didn’t work out, like I had essentially blown up my entire life for something temporary. But a larger, more evolved part of me knows that isn’t true.
I learned so much about myself in 6 months. I learned radical acceptance of who I am and of my dreams, no matter how crazy they may seem to other people. I learned there IS more out there, but that “more” doesn’t always equate to “better.”I learned that I am capable of handling far more than I ever imagined but more importantly I learned that I don’t have to isolate myself & maybe I do need “my” people after all.
My time in Charleston, and all the days after, have been some of the most confusing yet profound sources of joy and grief all at once. But nothing in life is ever truly a loss when experience and perspective are gained. In short- I was always supposed to go.
Perhaps my hunch was right, and life pulls me elsewhere again at some point. But for now, I am right where I belong 🩵
