The Ellis Herd

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03/11/2026

Ageism in interviews isn’t about your ability to. It’s about their control. What’s the worst coded rejection you have gotten?

03/11/2026

If your brain is worth picking, it’s worth paying for. “Pick your brain over coffee” is just “work for free” in a friendly font. After 47 free coffee meetings this year, I’m done. My expertise has a price now. Set your boundaries. Your time became valuable the second you stopped giving it away. 👑💜

03/10/2026

Door crime. The extent they go to to push You Out is crazy!

03/10/2026

Interviewers can’t legally ask your age. They do it anyway with these questions. Q1: “What year did you graduate?” (doing age math). Answer: “I graduated with degree in [field]. Happy to discuss how my education applies.” Q2: “Comfortable with younger manager?” (assumes you’re old with ego). Answer: “I’ve worked with managers of all experience levels. What matters is clear communication and shared goals.” Q3: “Can you keep up in fast-paced environment?” (implies old = slow). Answer: “I thrive in dynamic environments. Last role: managed 3 simultaneous launches, reduced delivery time 30%.” Redirect to qualifications, not age. If they push, that’s bias evidence. 🚨

03/09/2026

Quiet firing = making you miserable enough to quit so they don't pay severance or risk discrimination claims. Signs: workload doubles while others' stays same, excluded from meetings, 1:1s cancelled, projects reassigned mid-stream, ideas ignored then stolen, left out of communications, requests unanswered, set up to fail, documenting minor issues, manager "too busy" for you. This is intentional and strategic. What to do: document every pattern, DON'T quit (no severance/unemployment/legal recourse), make them fire you officially if that's their goal. They can pay for it. 🚨

03/08/2026

Before your exit interview, know this: everything you say gets documented and can be used in severance negotiations, unemployment claims, or legal proceedings. You’re not legally required to participate in most cases. If you’re considering legal action or negotiating severance, consult an employment attorney first about what to say—or whether to participate at all. If you do the interview, stick to facts not emotions, keep it brief and professional, and ask who will see the documentation. Your honest feedback won’t change the company, but it could impact your legal options. Protect yourself first. Common exit interview mistakes and what to say instead at link in bio. ⚠️

03/08/2026

At 50, I looked at my phone and realized 20 “close friends” hadn’t contacted me in over a year. They didn’t drift—they left. The coworker who was “like family”? Gone after my layoff. The networking group that loved my influence? Silent when it disappeared. Friends who valued my connections? Vanished when I wasn’t useful. At first you think it’s you. Then you realize: they were professional relationships disguised as friendship. When your professional value dropped, so did they. This hits different after 50—you don’t have time to rebuild. The friendship purge is painful, but it shows you who actually matters. How many “friends” disappeared after you lost status? 💔

03/08/2026

They offered two weeks severance. I negotiated six months. Not negotiating with manager. Negotiating with legal department. One job: make you go away quietly. What they’re buying: signature on release promise not sue. Over 40? Woman? POC? Disability? Worth more. Protected class means lawsuit risk. HR slides paper? Slide back. Say need attorney review this. Word attorney made you expensive. Ask for: More weeks. Extended benefits. Neutral reference writing. Unemployment protection. Key: Document everything first. Treatment changed after complained turned 40 took medical leave? Retaliation. Retaliation expensive. Walked in documentation. Offered two weeks. Asked six months. Unreasonable. Opened folder. Three hours deal. Not negotiating manager. Negotiating lawyers who don’t want problems. Be problem. Get paid.

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