11/23/2024
My German,
I called her. She was my Christmas present when we had little money to buy for each other in 2011. I called her Skylar, Don called her Molly Socks, and she loved getting into the clothes hamper looking for socks.
When Don passed in 2014, she was 3 years old, born on 11/29/11. She was a handful.
Don had heard a neighbor had a litter of German Shepherds but as she grew older, we knew she was part-chow/german.
The night Don passed, I found her in Don's closet, howling with this awful cry, she had brought down a few of his suits & wallowing...in his clothes.
I didn't know how to console her.
My life changed in one day.
My life has never been the same.
I moved to a smaller place,
(this is the hard part).
I had to leave.
Skylar was over 50 lbs.,
The new place denied my pet,
She couldn't be over 20 lbs.,
meaning I had to re-home her.
I remember praying that night.,
I was a lost individual in so many ways.
Don's big-man recliner couldn't go with me,
And so I began selling a few items to condense down.,
A lady responded to my ad,
I asked if she knew anybody that could
adopt a 3-year-old 😪? She said, "I'll go home & ask my husband & we'll pray about it.
The next morning, I was asked to bring Skylar, to see if she got along with their other dog. The first thing Skylar did,
jumped in the recliner, she was home.
And so she stayed.
Every year on Skylar's birthday, I would get pictures sent to me of her progress.
Every year I was invited to come visit,
telling me, I had visitation rights.
They changed her name to Molly,
unbeknownst to me...
which was Don's name [to her]
anyway. and because her birthday is upcoming, I decided to brave it & visit.
And because I associated the dog with my trauma in 2014, I wasn't sure emotionally
I could do it!?! I was sure she wouldn't remember me. The time spent with her,
my heart squeezed with emotions.
(I shook uncontrollably)....
the lady saw...and calmed me.
Her husband had many questions,
'why does Molly do this & why
does she do that? Why does she look for socks, why does she despise golf carts, etc.
I answered, going back in time, reaching back to memory lane, hard to open up that door of remembrance, only because every memory was attached to Don.
But....
Molly is happy, and content. I wanted to take her home with me. She didn't seem to remember me at all. (There are days I wish
I didn't remember things so vividly. )
She was my partner -she rode everywhere with me, in that old red '97 Ford Explorer, no a/c! at the beach lol. I kept asking her,
"Skylar, wanna go for a ride?" She ignored me,
just lying at my feet, sleeping.
As I was departing, the lady said,
"you have lost purpose."
I replied, "I am not the same person."
We hugged and made arrangements to revisit at another time. As I was getting in my car, Skylar/Molly, at the screened-in porch was barking profusely.
Maybe she did remember me.?.€.