09/02/2025
This week, I called a mentor who has deep respect in our industry with a simple but heavy question: “How do I get in the room? How do I get on the stage when I don’t look like the people who are already there?”
At the time, I was frustrated. I saw the same faces at every conference, the same people getting opportunities to grow because they were always in front of the right firms and decision makers. Meanwhile, I was trying to figure out how to get invited to tables where no one seemed to be pulling up a chair for me.
I’ll never forget what my mentor told me: “Be yourself. Always. If the world doesn’t see you the way I see you, that is their problem, not yours. Do not twist yourself into someone you are not just to fit in.”
That conversation reminded me of something powerful. I did not need to pay my way onto a stage or shape myself into a copy of the people who were already there. What I needed was to lean into who I am, to believe in the unique value I bring, and to trust that being authentic would open the right doors.
Since then, I have learned that confidence is not about trying to look like everyone else. It is about being proud of who you are, proud of what you bring to the table, and proud of the work you put into the world. I do not want to be in the room because I blended in. I want to be there because I stood out for the right reasons.
Every time I get off a call with that mentor, I walk away sharper, more grounded, and more focused. We do not talk every day, but when we do, it always matters.
The lesson I will pass forward is this: Have the confidence to believe in yourself. Be proud of your story, your differences, and your strengths. Do not wait for permission to belong. The doors that are meant for you will open, and when they do, you should walk through them with confidence as your authentic self.
