06/02/2025
The most disappointing conversation :
She came to me and said: “ Bled, I am a le***an and I was afraid to tell you because I thought you would be disappointed in me”.
I stood… stumped not by the revelation of her sexuality. But I was mostly shocked that one my closest friends thought I would be disappointed in her and that I would not want her around .
In this instance, I had two options: defend the values I held very dear and challenged her views of me , knowing well that not once I had given her such idea. Or I could simply apologize because whether or not I believed I had been kind and loving , she felt this way and I was not going to dismiss it.
So I apologized. Not out of weakness or anything. But I apologized . She did not need my principles or my convictions. She knew every single one of them and she knew there was no way anyone could deter me from them. She was not asking me to leave them behind.
My friend was asking me if I was willing to love the new her maybe from afar and then hopefully, from close. She was asking me if I was willing to treat her with dignity and honor.
You see, we live in this society where we do not know how to respect people beliefs system without asking them to give up part of who they are . We want it to be about us and only us… forgetting that we are a melting pot . And people have the right to hold on to their identity. That’s fine.
But what is not fine, is to degrade others because they believe a different way. To see them as less.
If you are part of the LGBTQIA+ community and you have people in your life who believe differently than you, please be respectful of their choices. Again, I am not talking about their hatred or disdain. That’s a whole new level of discussion. I mean what they believe to be right or wrong, that’s is their story. You do not have to accept it. But you must allow them be to.
If you are not an ally of the LGBTQIA+ for whatever reason, it is ok. No one is asking you to roll a red carpet for them. But what you are not allowed to be is a hateful human being. You can still stand with your principles without making others feel like their mere existence is a disease to you.
And if you must ask what happened with my friend, well she is one of the best humans I know. She has seen me through brokenness and stood by me. She is crazy about my children and loves them to death. She is one of my best sisters. She respects my faith. She makes me a better person.
And boy, I love her fiercely. I love her fiercely and she is allowed in my house, my life, around my children and in my heart.