07/06/2025
What history teaches us,,,,, or what it should.
More than a picture - more than words .. this was hard to relive this emotional journey ...
The reality of wild mustangs - their destiny if we dont keep fighting.. this is the story of loss. For these two - they at least died wild and free. But it doesnt make it easier to process
In 2015 my world changed, for the better. By accident, I was introduced to the Salt River Wild Horses, who I had no idea existed. I've lived in Arizona since 1991, and as a horse lover since the age of 4, had I known, my adult life may have been quite different.
However, what we learn as we age, everything happens for a reason. In 2015 and for the next 4 years, I immersed myself to help fight for them.
No one ever knows what anyone of us does day in and day out. Those who run Sanctuaries and advocate for causes have no life, no time, no day to themselves. Every day there are issues, mostly medical sick with colic, threatened by round up, people harassing, the building of a foundation of a 501c3 is more than anyone knows.
Among wild horses on Western HMAs and in Arizona there are lost horses, foals that need intervention, and none of it is documented by mainstream media. The media coverage is a double edge sword, on one hand it increases awareness but it also increases scrutiny. Everyone thinks they can do it better
This is what keeps them safe. And there is so much more. However, I want to share at this moment what Ive learned and my journey and why I advocate.
I was not a wildlife photographer. However, I was obsessed and spent every day I could at the river building friendships and learning about the herd while photographing them. As a former "all things human or architecture photographer", I was clueless about photographing moving wild horses or any animal. My images now are so different......but I still work to capture a bond, and create a world of magic.
My first images I had to improvise. I did not have a long enough lens for wildlife, and even though good gear -it was not a super fast camera. So my images, often blurry, or the horses were so small in a scene. But, I was determined to capture what I was witnessing first hand. They taught me about myself, also how to be patient, to be calm, to be relaxed, and many more things. So I wanted to figure out how to capture those emotions, it became my number one goal.
Because they were at risk, the best way I could illustrate their story and the importance of awareness, was to take pictures, add my words to take the viewer up close and personal. I needed people to feel. So I focus on the bonds, the families, learning how much they were like human family's. To capture that, if others saw it, maybe they would fight for them as hard as we fought. I cropped, to the point it affected the quality of the photos. Many were only 1/10th of the image. But, they looked ok on a screen and achieved my "main goal" capture emotion. I just would not be printing.
And, to my surprise, it worked, soon friends I grew up with and met while I moved so much, were commenting on the photos. I would write poetry or tell their story to go along with the picture. Photos alone for me would not be enough. It had to feel real, raw and my effort to make people laugh, cry, get angry, feel warm and fuzzy, would be something I wanted to gift the horses through images and the stories that brought them to life.
I chose the bonds.. always, if the horses were not touching or interacting, with one another, I focused on portraits of when they curiously looked over at me. The power they have is priceless and cannot be put into words or illustrated by any image.
If my work can't help those who had no idea what is happening, to see and feel, then my work is meaningless. I dont care about likes, I dont care if people find my images technically perfect, or every pretty. I only care if people see, then feel and want to help. It's not a contest, my photos are only for the horses. Which I why I would go in and out of sharing, or posting, or even editing. Every image I edit is like a journey, I feel and if in the moment I capture they have fear, or sorrow, like the horses did in Onaqui after the round ups, I shut down.
Since the Salts are again at risk, it is very hard for me to edit or look at these photographs. Because I know just how serious and my fear if I acknowledge it, it terrifies me what could happen to them.
For years even prior to, I didn't share, because seeing wildlife is not always pretty,,, or as pictures make it seem. There is death, there is suffering, there is loss. And watching all of the above became too much. I would connect with a horse, photograph it write about it, then it would get hit by a car or die of colic. So I would stop going to the river or stop coming home to edit, because it was hard looking at every face,,, knowing what man is doing to them over and over.
The image above- makes me sad. Both the mare and her foal passed years ago. I knew them very well. I usually keep the images close of those we lost and I won't share, but often archive them.
However, there is a point I want to make. Im happy I knew them, that I documented them, got to know what a fierce mother she was and what a charismatic baby the foal was,,,, My photography was not then what it is now. So my pictures were pictures not an artistic image of pure beauty and perfection or an illustration of what I wanted to accomplish and worked to achieve. I did crop many photos of these two, together, alone, with the band, with their siblings, and during the foal once a yearling final days. The foal was my first big loss, and so at that moment my heavy involvement as boots on the ground .. became less and less.
What I learned through history with my time on the river, is not just how to photograph wild life, but also how to monitor, watch behaviors, it has helped me with my work with domestics and dogs. Because to truly watch is to listen with our eyes what they are telling us, not being able to speak.
I choose now to not just edit, but look, and observe the nature around them. To use it to be part of an image, to wait and be quiet and let them be so I can capture that perfect nuzzle, or a whinny or a yawn, or a kiss or a kick to a foal not behaving, or to a stallion that won't leave mother mare alone, to watch the bachelors bond after being kicked out of their families. And sadly even when they cry, because to document any animal - the only way to truly understand and tell their story is to experience all of it.
Photographing wild horses in the trees, with shadows, so many obstacles, it becomes a craft to truly illustrate their world, not how we think it should be,,, We want to experience wild, that is what it is, wild is unforgiving, it is raw, it is telling and whispers secrets to us to survive but only if we are aware and we listen and watch in silence.
I still aim to capture the bonds, the families, and have learned to use the trees, branches and shadows, to make something unique. We all have a style, we all have our way of telling our story, we all have our experiences with things that change our life and teach us to be better.
So in my parting thought, our government needs to do better, people who hate wild life need to be better, people who hate others who are fighting to save them, need to work harder to have a meeting of the minds.
Because guess what, I guarantee watching this mare fight 3 stallions to stay by her foal for a week as she fought for her life, showed all of us why. Why we all should fight for what we love and believe in, even if it means, we put ourselves out there and risk pain, and vulnerability.
Horses are prey animals, vulnerable, and right now if you think you know what is happening to wild horses, I guarantee it is 1000 times worse. IF you think our government cares (either side) neither does, about our land, wildlife, wild horses or any wild or living creature. That includes us.
WE should be working together to LEARN FROM HISTORY, so we STOP MAKING THE SAME MISTAKES.
That is crucial, to not only our environment, our planet, animals, but also to us.
Thank you Cream and thank you Peaches, I dont have it in me to read and share the poem I wrote when we lost you. But I hope this image of you and your mom help others to feel what is needed in order to keep all the other wild horses safe ....
Because just like us .. to them FAMILY IS EVERYTHING ... and this is why so many people fight so hard. Because family is not always of blood, or human, but are those who make us feel alive and are there no matter what, never judging and filling us to make us feel whole.
This is what these mustang families have done for me, please research.
Hundreds and thousands of horses are sent to slaughter and of those it includes wild horses. The greed is exponential and they are dying by the thousands, because they have become a scapegoat for all the destruction done by man, and man alone.
Butcher Jones 2016
The Early Years....
