The Peedmont

04/25/2024

Hey Peedmonters -

Thank you all so much for the outpouring of love and support for us from over the last few days. Words can't describe how that feels to us.

We received many inquiries regarding our merch store and if more t-shirts were going to be made available. We went ahead and updated the store if you want any nostalgic memorabilia or a cheap gift for a friend or foe:
https://the-peedmont.creator-spring.com/?

Additionally, Style Weekly did a cool retrospective on us along with a couple of behind-the-scenes moments from the archives: https://www.styleweekly.com/the-peedmont-signs-off/

Till next time,

Peedmont HQ

04/22/2024

Hello Peedmonters!

We've long enjoyed bringing you the most trusted satire the Commonwealth has to offer since we went live in 2016. However, it's with heavy hearts that we announce that we're ceasing publishing and shutting The Peedmont down. It's been a wonderful run, but our dedicated staff is ready to move on to other things, and we feel now is the time to do just that and close up shop.

Thank you to everyone who has supported us over the years by reading, sharing, promoting, or in some cases actually believing our work. All of you kept us going and helped make The Peedmont into something truly special that we'll cherish forever.

As always, please share any memories or favorite articles from the archives in the comments below.

We'll see you down the road — most likely in a traffic jam on I-95.

Cheers,

Peedmont HQ

03/30/2024

Visit the post for more.

03/16/2024

Per witness accounts, Desmond and his friends staggered to the festivities, which honor parts of Irish culture like Celtic music and the fast-paced Irish step dancing, stopping only once to vomit into the trash bin outside of a CVS Pharmacy.

RICHMOND, Va. — While commemorating and honoring the patron saint of Ireland, Church Hill resident Derek Desmond became completely obliterated before pi***ng in a secluded alleyway in Scott’s Addit…

01/22/2024

“The results confirmed what we thought all along. Central Virginians know what they want from a grocery store, and that something is the nostalgic taste of a lightly toasted White House Roll with a little bit of butter spread across the top, among other related items.”

RICHMOND, Va. — A new study commissioned by the Virginia Grocery Store Association (VGSA) has revealed that 100% of Richmonders pick their grocery store based on whether or not the store carries Uk…

01/16/2024

“ARE YOU TAKING THE P**S?! IT’S SUPPOSED TO BE PIZZA YOU DONKEYS!"

RICHMOND, Va. — Despite pledging to commit 24 hours towards fixing Chanello’s Pizza, Celebrity Chef Gordon Ramsey reportedly gave up after 35 minutes calling it “disgusting,” “a disgrace,” an…

01/12/2024

“I mean, honestly, it was probably the art school’s fault.”

RICHMOND, Va. — While studying for an upcoming test in the open air of Virginia Commonwealth University’s famous Compass Plaza, junior engineering student Samantha Mayer noticed that something was …

01/11/2024

“Will the transition be costly? Yes, but is it inevitable. And is it the right thing to do to address it now? Absolutely.”

As of press time Domin-, wait, nevermind, haha jk lol. Our bad.

RICHMOND, Va. – Dominion Energy, Inc., commonly referred to as Dominion, announced today that it would immediately begin implementing sweeping changes to its energy production & transfer …

01/10/2024

"During soundcheck, I remembered this great meme I saw from Occupy Democrats about Ron DeSantis and thought ‘hey, I bet the audience would really dig that.’ But when the time came, I couldn’t remember it.”

WASHINGTON — Local indie punk band Black Vulture forgot to deliver an uneducated political statement during their concert at the Black Cat, sources confirmed Wednesday. “We got to the start of the …

01/09/2024

“Maybe he’s just happy about getting a day out of class. Whatever, it still beats going to that farm out in Culpeper.”

ALEXANDRIA, Va. — Wasting no time in getting his permission slip for the occasion signed by his mother, Tyler Christie, a fourth grader at John Adams Elementary School in Alexandria, is extremely e…

01/04/2024

“The bay’s got quite a lot of nasty stuff in it, so we figure a little bit of Clorox will do her some good.”

REEDVILLE, VA. — The Virginia Department of Environmental Quality (DEQ) announced plans to chlorinate the Chesapeake Bay, officials within the department confirmed Friday. RELATED (article continue…

01/03/2024

“I ended up scanning a single avocado 12 times, but I was too scared to tell someone.”

NEWPORT NEWS, Va. — Local Kroger customers have reported that the store’s scanners are refusing to cooperate during the self-checkout process. Customer Jennifer Miller told reporters that she was u…