12/29/2025
TRUMPIES PAY HERE (& Non-Trumpies Too)
Know-Nothing Trump supporters
Whom I have warned for the last ten years
For the last ten years of my life
YOU OWE ME MONEY!!
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Remember all the people
People in this country who denied
Denied that disappearances and crimes against humanity
Would take place under Trump?
CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY!!
Remember when I told you
That crimes against humanity would take place under Trump?
Yeah, sure you do
They smeared themselves greasily all over social media
All over social media with their denialist know-nothing gaslighting windbagging
And I arrayed myself in armor to combat them
Did you?
They invaded and occupied our families, converted our friends
Coverted themselves among the masses in the form of any given stranger
Remember how I said they would owe me money for being such a know-nothing?
I SAID THEY WOULD OWE ME MONEY
I SAID THEY WOULD OWE ME MONEY
For being such an intellectually inert thing as a practitioner of willful ignorance
Willful ignorance and the obfuscation of facts
The obfuscation of facts to such an extent
To such an extent that I have to stop what I'm doing
Stop what I'm doing and educate them?
Educate them?
Again?
We already tried that, remember?
Remember when they had the chance to fund more teachers in red states
In red states they had the chance to fund more teachers
To fund more teachers or to cut funding to schools
To cut funding to schools means they hate education
They hate education, conservatives do, so they cut funding to school programs
They cut funding to school programs because they hate education
Remember when they cut funding to school programs
In a fit of blind conservative obeisance
Obeisance to a foul philosophy
To hate education as if born and raised to the task?
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I remember that
Because I had to survive in that small town
In that small town with their small system
Alongside their own children getting threshed in their small system
A small town system of oppression that will forever cure a man from looking on rural living with a kindly mien.
I tried to educate them, remember?
Them children from that there small town, remember?
Remember my life as an adult all them years ago?
All them years ago when the parents of all them children
Tried to cut education funding altogether
Altogether now
For that they altogether hated education.
I remember when
In that there town
Trying yesterday to educate them children of tomorrow
I tried to educate them children
If children like them educated may be
Maybe it could have been worse
Worse than that
Than that them children of yesterday
Would grow up to resemble their parents' ignorance of yesteryear?
Why, if teaching 'twere a calling, then consider me one of the charmed
Charmed to perform for you here on Facebook tonight
On Facebook today
Every day and night
Educating the spawnling and know-nothing alike
Educating them over and over again for days on end
For days on end I had to school them people, remember?
Effing days on end.
Will I have to call them a dunce in public to make it clear that I wasn't joking?
I wasn't joking, clearly - the dunces owe their teacher money.
THEY OWE THEIR TEACHER MONEY!!
I says and then I says it again, they owe their teacher money and then
THEY OWE THEIR TEACHER MORE MONEY!!
To paraphrase a certain school principal I once defied,
I'M GOING TO TAKE IT OUT OF THEIR WALLETS OR I'M GOING TO TAKE IT OUT OF THEIR HIDES.
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Like back in the goddamn good ol' days
Days when you paid your schoolmarms directly, got it?
Got it, you bunch of filthy rich techknow-nothing degenerates?
I'm still alive to collect and now
YOU OWE ME MONEY!!
You can check for yourselves as time goes by
As time goes by whether and to what extent
To what extent this fundraising effort serves to line my coffers
To line my coffers with the filthy lucre of the filthy rich
The filthy lucre of the filthy rich
The filthy lucre of the filthy rich, say it with me
Say it with me,
WE'RE GOING TO TAKE THE FILTHY lucre FROM THE FILTHY RICH
OR WE'RE GOING TO TAKE IT OUT OF THEIR HIDES
I have a prediction to make and
if my prediction plays out true then you
You will also owe me money
dear reader.
Dear reader,
Something tells me the filthy rich might not have been paying attention in class
they might not have fully absorbed the lesson I have to give them
I have to give them a lesson, you see, and something tells me they haven't fully absorbed it yet
Haven't they fully absorbed it yet, dear reader of the future?
I speak to you now from a future past
They haven't fully absorbed it yet, have I got that right, future humans?
I predict the filthy rich somehow haven't yet learned their lesson quite.
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Quiet, future humans
Future humans,
When next you catch one of those arrogant brats with their filthy little paw in the family cookie jar,
Reach not, I say, for the ruler
For the ruler, reach rather for the chainsaw
The chainsaw I says, yep
Yep, try going after that little troublemaking brat with a chainsaw until they learn their lesson
Going after them with a chainsaw might get the message through
Or drive the message home
Or post the most important emoji they're ever going to see
See, you have to cut through their veneer of indifference
So blubbery their hide
Their hiding cannot last forever
Go after them with a chainsaw since that's what they've done to us
THAT'S WHAT THEY'VE DONE TO US
Why not give it a try?
Remember when the Resident-in-Chief said, 'why not give it at try?'
If you still don't know why not
YOU NOW OWE ME MONEY.
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If you sat at home
If you sat it out
If you laid down for the know-nothing fascists
because you believe, pathetically, that it's easier to give an authoritarian what they want
If you would rather give an authoritarian what they want instead of fighting
Instead of fighting back, you sorry quitter -
YOU OWE ME MONEY!!
The chainsaw, dear reader of future humans
That's what the know-nothing horde has taken to us
They have taken the chainsaw to us and we know it
We need them to know that we know
Make sure they know that, please
Please make sure they know you know by donating below.
THEY OWE US MONEY.
Future hordes make future hoards possible
So, if possible, reach deep within your personal inner leathery wallet
And remember that, as we're in the season for giving
Forgiving your enemies
For giving your enemies a swift kick in the arse
For as far as Mr. Techno-Bro Richie Rich sees the world
Every season as just another
Season for the taking.
Consider the gruesome truth that
After future humans amputate the cookie-thieving arms of those filthy degenerate brats
No hard working
Fair dealing
Education loving schoolmarm
Will ever have to rap their knuckles again.
While I appreciate your attention, now you should stop reading and:
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