McSweeney's

06/12/2026

"It wasn't an easy decision, but once Brad talked to the architect, it just made sense to go with five stories, nine bedrooms, eleven bathrooms, and a six-car garage with a glass door that reflects the setting sun like the Eye of Sauron."

“It wasn’t an easy decision, but once Brad talked to the architect, it just made sense to go with five stories, nine bedrooms, eleven bathrooms, and a six-ca...

06/11/2026

"Xavier owns an apartment that he rents out at a loss of $1 billion/month. Seeing this success, he decides to make financial commitments to construct $850 billion in new apartments in places nobody wants them...."

“Xavier owns an apartment that he rents out at a loss of $1 billion/month. Seeing this success, he decides to make financial commitments to construct $850 bi...

06/11/2026

The latest edition of our weekly comic about artistic animals trying to power through life in a bleak forest.

The latest edition of our weekly comic about artistic animals trying to power through life in a bleak forest.

06/11/2026

A traveler asked: “How could ancient people possibly understand mathematics?”

Excellent question. We accidentally invented geometry while trying to avoid carrying rocks incorrectly.

A traveler asked: “How could ancient people possibly understand mathematics?” Excellent question. We accidentally invented geometry while trying to avoid car...

06/11/2026

"I awaken from sleep with the unparalleled energy of someone who has an entire school-sanctioned day in which to humiliate their offspring."

“I awaken from sleep with the unparalleled energy of someone who has an entire school-sanctioned day in which to humiliate their offspring.”

06/10/2026

"Yes, we know it’s a bummer. However, due to low ticket sales, low hotel bookings, and generally low enthusiasm, oxygen is the only necessity left for us to exploit."

“Yes, we know it’s a bummer. However, due to low ticket sales, low hotel bookings, and generally low enthusiasm, oxygen is the only necessity left for us to ...

06/10/2026

"I implore you to weigh the consequences of your actions. You are damning yourself to a wretched eternity of opening all email and Slack links in Apple’s Safari browser. And that is to speak nothing of the hexes."

“I implore you to weigh the consequences of your actions. You are damning yourself to a wretched eternity of opening all email and Slack links in Apple’s Saf...

06/10/2026

Read an exclusive interview with Documentary Now! Directors (and book collaborators) Rhys Thomas and Alex Buono on The Reveal!

Documentary Now! (Fourth Edition, Revised and Expanded) is out now wherever books are sold.

Link in bio to read.

06/10/2026

"You spent hours researching baby strollers, reading safety reports, and scouting sales. Did you consider studying basic quantum physics instead?"

“You spent hours researching baby strollers, reading safety reports, and scouting sales. Did you consider studying basic quantum physics instead?”

06/10/2026

A large pot sits in plain sight. There’s a frog in it.

Every day, Leader announces his plans to boil the frog. His campaign slogan was “BOIL THAT FROG.”

A man stirs the pot with a large stick. “It’s a metaphor,” he says.

The frog is sweating.

A large pot sits in plain sight. There’s a frog in it. Every day, Leader announces his plans to boil the frog. His campaign slogan was “BOIL THAT FROG.” A ma...