07/10/2026
Ever since my children were little, Iāve always told them:
āThere are 6 of you. THERE IS NO REASON ANY ONE OF YOU SHOULD EVER LIVE IN NEED.ā
Always visit each other.
Call each other.
Check on each other.
And when you go to one of your siblingsā homes, check their fridge.
If you see they need something, donāt make them feel bad about it. Donāt hold it over their head. Donāt wait until they have to ask.
Quietly go and buy it for them.
If one of you is going through a difficult season, the other 5 come together and figure out how to help.
If later itās another one of you, then the other 5 step in.
And so on.
Why is this lesson so important to me?
Because my mother had 5 childrenā¦ but I canāt say that we have all helped one another equally.
Some of us have always done more than others.
And even though everything I have ever done, Iāve done out of love, if Iām being fairā¦ it shouldnāt be that way.
There has been envy, jealousy, control, gossip, judgment, hurtful words, and other things too.
And those are things I have never allowed between my children and never will.
My grandmother, on the other hand, had 11 childrenā¦ and it was even worse.
Petty rivalries.
Jealousy.
Division.
Without saying too much, some lived believing they were better than everyone elseā¦ while others were rejected as if they didnāt even belong to the same family.
And over the years, Iāve realized it wasnāt only on my motherās side.
It happened a lot on my fatherās side too.
And we have even seen things in my husbandās family that we never want to repeat with our childrenā¦ and never want them to repeat with one another.
That is why, for my husband and me, there is no greater legacy than working to break those cycles and generational chains in our family and in the generations that come after us.
Because yes, we want to leave things behind for our children.
But before money, property, or a last nameā¦
we want to leave them each other.
We want to leave them a family free from addictions and with Christ as the priority.
So that when we are no longer here, they know they still have family.
So that none of them ever believes they are better than another.
So that the one who has more never looks down on the one who has less.
And so that if one of them falls, they never have to get back up alone while 5 siblings stand by and watch from a distance.
That is one of the cycles we have decided to break.
And we have been teaching them this since they were little.
Unlike what we experienced in our own families, we want our children to let their children grow up with their cousins.
To go places together.
To spend holidays and seasons together.
To respect one another.
To love one another.
To love their siblingsā partners like another brother or sister.
And even when we are no longer here, we want them to remain united.
In fact, that is why this year my husband and I decided to break away from toxicity and distance ourselves from people who do not align with the values of our home.
From people who, at one point or another, have hurt him, me, or even our 6 children.
Because yes, there are 6 of them. Not 2.
If my husband calls all 6 of them his children, helped raise all 6 of them, and treats all 6 of them as his own, then no one who wants to be part of our lives should see only the children who share his blood as his children while treating the others as if they are not.
And although it hasnāt been easy, this was the year we decided together to dedicate ourselves to building our family of 8 into a home free from the toxicity of this world.
Whoever does not respect him does not get access to me.
Whoever does not respect me does not get access to him.
And whoever causes emotional harm to either one of usāor to any one of our 6 childrenādoes not get access to our family either.
In this home, we do not beg for love.
We do not accept pain or humiliation just because it comes from family.
Because we are building a strong and healthy home.
JESUS Himself loved everyone, but He did NOT give everyone access to Him.
Boundaries, even within family, are necessary and healthy.
My oldest sister always told me:
āYour family is your husband and all of your children. And his family is you and all of your children.ā
There is so much truth in that advice.
This is and always will be a home where we do not allow jealousy, competition, superiority, criticism, gossip, prejudice, or disrespect.
We do not want to keep repeating the same patterns and then wonder why the next generation ended up the same.
And although everyone who knows our children always tells my husband and me, āYou two raised such good kidsā š„¹ā¦ itās because, after God, they have always been and always will be our priority.
But God has been and always will be at the center of it all.
And it is all because of HIM.
Someone had to decide:
It ends here.
And we decided that in our family, it would begin with us. š„¹
All for healthier generations, with God truly at the center of it all.
From us forward. š¤
And you, tell meā¦
Have you broken a cycle?
What cycle in your family are you trying to make sure ends with you?
