09/18/2026
Sometimes the conflict isn’t really about the thing people SAY it’s about.
Bill Taylor calls this going “Below the Line.”
An athlete says they want more playing time.
A parent is upset about a coaching decision.
A player asks for more scholarship money.
That’s the issue on the surface.
But underneath it might be something completely different: respect, feeling valued, fear, pressure, trust, expectations, or wanting to feel heard.
That’s where real conflict resolution begins.
If you only address the surface-level problem, you might “solve” the issue and still leave the person feeling worse than before.
Great coaches and leaders learn to ask better questions, understand the person behind the problem, and figure out what’s really driving the conflict.
This was one of my favorite concepts from my conversation with Bill Taylor, author of Managing Sports Conflict: 5 Tools to Master Conflict.
🎙️ Full Episode 475 of The Gametime Guru is available now.
What do you think: how often do we argue about the surface issue when the REAL issue is something deeper?