05/07/2025
I used to scream at my wife and kids.
I had suicidal thoughts.
I was reactive, explosive, numb, and angry at the world.
But then something broke inside me… and I finally started to heal.
This is my story—for the men who feel like I used to.
I wasn’t always like that.
But somewhere along the way, I became someone I didn’t recognize.
I was yelling, cussing, pushing away the people I loved most.
My wife.
My daughters.
And I thought I was “just stressed.”
Truth is… I was hurting.
I didn’t know how to deal with my emotions.
I didn’t even know what I was feeling half the time.
I just knew I felt broken. Useless. Ashamed. Like a failure as a man and as a father.
And I didn’t tell anyone.
I buried it.
I had suicidal thoughts.
I never planned it. But I thought about not waking up.
I thought my family would be better off without me.
And even that made me feel like a piece of s**t.
But I didn’t talk to anyone about it. I just kept pretending I was “fine.”
Everything changed when I had an inner child breakthrough.
I connected with the boy inside me.
The one who didn’t feel safe. The one who didn’t know how to ask for love.
That experience cracked me open.
I cried like I hadn’t in years.
I felt my feelings instead of running from them.
That moment started my healing journey.
I began learning how to pause before reacting.
How to feel my anger without letting it control me.
How to apologize.
How to be a safe space—not a storm—for my wife and daughters.
I’m still learning. Still messing up.
But I’m not who I used to be.
On the Fourth of July, I met my wife’s cousin.
His name’s Zach.
We connected instantly. He opened up about his trauma, and I told him about mine.
I told him about the suicidal thoughts.
About being reactive.
And about how healing changed everything.
He said he yells at his girlfriend. Reacts just like I used to.
I told him what I wish someone had told me:
“You can learn to control your feelings, bro. You don’t have to destroy everything you love.”
He messaged his girl that night and told her he was getting help.
That moved me.
I realized something after that talk with him.
Maybe this is my purpose now.
To speak to men like me.
The ones who don’t know how to express love without control.
The ones who feel broken.
The ones who are still scared to ask for help.
I want to reach them before they do irreversible damage.
If that’s you—if you’re a man who feels lost, angry, ashamed…
You’re not alone.
Healing doesn’t make you weak.
Owning your pain and deciding to change? That takes strength.
I’m walking this path too.
DM me.
Or just follow along.
We’re not done yet.
