23/09/2026
**Touring the Tons**
(With apologies to DMC® — I originally posted this in the *wrong* Dull Men’s Club. 😅)
There are a lot of place names ending in **“ton”** around my local area in the Cotswolds, UK.
The suffix **“ton” or “tone”** comes from the Anglo-Saxon **“tun”**, meaning “farmstead,” so my village of **Woolstone** would originally have meant something like **Wool’s Farm**.
Naturally, being both dull and geeky, I made a map.
Using data from the wonderfully named **Ordnance Survey**, I found more than **6,500 “Tons” across Great Britain**. 🗺️
At first, I thought the almost complete absence of Tons in Wales was a mistake, but a local historian explained that it likely reflects the limited Anglo-Saxon settlement there, apart from some later incursions along parts of the south coast.
There are also some other surprisingly sparse areas, particularly around London, and I’m hoping the DMC hive mind can shed some light on why.
Being a keen cyclist, I then started visiting some of these Tons. 🚴♂️
A friend named the hobby **“Tonning”** — which also fits nicely with recent posts about turning nouns into verbs.
We then created the collaborative **“Tons Game”**, encouraging members of our cycling club to visit as many Tons as possible over the summer.
This was clearly too dull even for the other **400+ members** of our club, because we appear to be the only two people actually playing. 😏
So far, we’ve visited **over 400 Tons**, including achieving the legendary **“Ton of Tons”** — more than 100 Tons in a single ride.
For non-UK readers, “a ton” is also British slang for one hundred, which makes this achievement significantly more satisfying than it probably should be.
The second map shows our progress so far and also highlights just how many Tons there are in our local area.
Male, 59.
UK size 10 shoes.
One leg 12 mm shorter than the other.
Banana shown to scale somewhere on the maps. 🍌
Kudos if you can find it. 😏
The images show the full Great Britain Tons map and a closer view of some of the Tons near me, including part of our **Tour des Tons** route.