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Zabalaza News The struggle continues... STILL - KEEPING IT REAL!

ZABALAZA NEWS – WHEN TRUTH CUTS DEEPER THAN PODCASTS!EISH, MZANSI! While some “podcasts” are out here running their mout...
25/08/2025

ZABALAZA NEWS – WHEN TRUTH CUTS DEEPER THAN PODCASTS!

EISH, MZANSI! While some “podcasts” are out here running their mouths, painting Coloured people as “incestuous” for clout and clicks, real horror is happening right under their noses.

This week, Limpopo gave us a gut-wrenching reality check:
An 18-year-old boy from Lwandlamuni village allegedly r***d his 9-year-old sister. Even worse? His own mother – the one who’s supposed to protect that child – kept quiet about it! The community themselves had to take the little girl and the suspect to the police.

Brigadier Mashaba confirmed:

Boy locked up on r**e charges

Mother arrested for failing to report

Now here’s the thing, Zabalaza fam – these so-called “content creators” love to point fingers at certain races, spreading stereotypes and lies. But abuse has no colour, no race, no culture – it’s evil everywhere.

While we’re busy arguing on social media about who does what, our kids are suffering in silence. And that’s the real shame of South Africa today.

So here’s our call: Protect the children. Expose the criminals. Cancel the abusers, not each other.

ZABALAZA NEWS – ELON, COME FETCH YOUR MKHULU!HAIBO! Mzansi, sit down for this one – a 40-year-old Kenyan grootman is out...
25/08/2025

ZABALAZA NEWS – ELON, COME FETCH YOUR MKHULU!

HAIBO! Mzansi, sit down for this one – a 40-year-old Kenyan grootman is out here telling the world “I AM ELON MUSK’S SON!”

So basically, while Elon was busy launching rockets to Mars, this oke was launching chapati to the plate and waiting for his billionaire dad to finally “recognise” him. Yoh! Next thing, he’s gonna ask Elon for 50 cows, 10 goats and 2 bitcoins as lobola for his wedding.

He’s even rocking that “I’m ready for inheritance” African shirt, standing there like, “Tata Elon, I’m tired of poverty, activate my trust fund.”

Elon must be somewhere in Texas like: “How do I have a 40-year-old son when I’m only 54?!” Bruh, Africa’s maths is undefeated!

Zabalaza fam – do you believe him, or is this just another kasi hustle to become the first African to own a Tesla by bloodline?

ZABALAZA NEWS – SA LOVES DIGGING UP BONES, BRU!Yoh, Mzansi, we’re at it AGAIN! As if the old K-word saga wasn’t enough, ...
25/08/2025

ZABALAZA NEWS – SA LOVES DIGGING UP BONES, BRU!

Yoh, Mzansi, we’re at it AGAIN! As if the old K-word saga wasn’t enough, now they’ve unearthed a new one from Minister Gayton McKenzie – and this time, it’s about the Springboks! Ja, you read that right… our green-and-gold heroes, the pride of the nation, and this oke was out there back in the day throwing shade on Twitter like it was confetti.

They found an old tweet where Gayton basically called the Springboks “unpatriotic”. Now everyone’s like, “How can you run Sports & Culture when you were chirping the Boks like that?” Eish, only in South Africa, my bru.

This whole thing feels like Mzansi’s new hobby – digging up people’s past like we’re doing archaeology in the Karoo. Ten-year-old tweets? Fifteen-year-old Facebook posts? Flip, some of you can’t even find your Eskom bill, but you’re CSI’ing someone’s 2011 internet history.

Gayton himself is like, “Nah, this is just haters looking for anything to cancel me with.” And to be fair, it’s true – this is SA now: cancel culture with load-shedding breaks.

So here’s the question, Zabalaza fam – do we judge a man forever on his past, or do we move on? ‘Cause if we keep playing this game, there’s a lot of politicians who are about to get exposed harder than a kasi fridge without power.

Drop your 2c below – is Gayton being held accountable, or is this just another South African witch hunt?

10/08/2025

My Heritage. My Dignity. Not Your Stereotype. Kullid is not a crime.

“If leadership is a relay race… did we pass the baton or drop it?”Five faces, one nation, many stories.
10/08/2025

“If leadership is a relay race… did we pass the baton or drop it?”
Five faces, one nation, many stories.

Michael Jordan is often considered the GOAT (Greatest of All Time) in basketball for several key reasons that go beyond ...
27/07/2025

Michael Jordan is often considered the GOAT (Greatest of All Time) in basketball for several key reasons that go beyond just stats or championships. Here's a breakdown of why he's held in such high regard:

🏆 Dominance in Championships

6 NBA Championships – Jordan won six titles with the Chicago Bulls (1991–1993, 1996–1998).

6 NBA Finals MVPs – He was the best player in every Finals series he played and won.

Never lost in the Finals – A perfect 6–0 record in the NBA Finals, something few can claim.

📊 Legendary Stats

Career averages: 30.1 PPG (highest in NBA history), 6.2 RPG, 5.3 APG.

10 scoring titles – Most in NBA history.

Defensive Player of the Year (1988) – He dominated both ends of the floor.

5 regular-season MVP awards.

🧠 Killer Mentality

Relentless competitiveness – Jordan had a drive and will to win that few athletes have ever matched.

Clutch performer – He hit countless game-winners and delivered when the pressure was highest.

Mamba Mentality before Kobe – He set the blueprint.

🔥 Iconic Moments

"The Shot" over Craig Ehlo (1989).

Flu Game (Game 5, 1997 Finals).

Final shot in a Bulls uniform (Game 6, 1998 Finals).

🌍 Global Impact

Made basketball global – Jordan's influence helped the NBA explode internationally in the '90s.

Air Jordan brand – Revolutionized athlete endorsements and sneakers.

Pop culture icon – Space Jam, commercials, global fame — he transcended sports.

🐐 Legacy

Inspired generations – LeBron, Kobe, and others credit MJ as their blueprint.

Cultural impact – He became more than a player — he became a symbol of excellence, confidence, and dominance.

🆚 Compared to Others

LeBron James might have longevity and all-around stats.

Kobe Bryant had the killer instinct.

Magic Johnson had showtime flair. But Jordan combined everything – skill, mindset, accolades, and global influence – with no weakness.

In short:

> Michael Jordan wasn't just the best player. He changed the game.


















27/07/2025

🗞️ ZABALAZA NEWS BULLETIN
“VELD TAKERS vs LAW ABIDERS – THE COLOURED DILEMMA”
🎭 When patience gets you nowhere, and toilets only arrive by rebellion.

BREAKING: TOILETS LAND WHERE THE COURAGE IS... JUST NOT IN COLOURED AREAS 🚽💨

For years, people from Ennerdale to Khayelitsha have been planting shacks like sunflowers 🌻 — no permission, no papers, just passion and planks. And the government?
Sends toilets faster than Eskom can send loadshedding!

But when Coloured folk pitch a tent?
🚓 “Code Red! Illegal structure detected!”
📜 “Please submit your land use application in triplicate and wait 6-8 years.”

COLOUREDS: FOLLOW THE LAW, GET THE LAW.

Coloured people, being the only group still trying to play Monopoly by the rules, end up renting their ma se garage while others build empires on sand dunes.

Meanwhile, the government’s GNU — Good for No-one Usually — keeps gazing into its budget hole while communities burn for space.

AND THEN THERE’S SABC...

📺 SABC, always quick to pitch in coloured areas when a gangster gets klapped or when someone throws a brick at a ward councillor.

But when it comes to:
– Khoi and San land rights?
– Coloured housing crisis?
– Backyarders reclaiming veld?

🦗 Dead silence.
BLIND. DEAF. GATVOL.

AND THE FINAL PLOT TWIST…

Just as Auntie Berenice finishes pitching her tent next to her cousin’s car wreck, a blacked-out bakkie pulls up. Dust. Leather. Sunglasses.

🦸🏽‍♂️ It’s Gayton. Da Ou. Again.

> “Who’s crying for land? I’m here. Got your back. And maybe a few bricks.”

He steps out, Burger in one hand, Court Order in the other.
"Time to moer the system... WITHIN the system."

Moral of the story?
Build without asking. Cry loud. And never forget:
If it ain’t trending, SABC ain’t bending.










📢 DISCLAIMER:

This content is satirical and created purely for entertainment and social commentary purposes. It uses humor, exaggeration, and parody to highlight real issues faced by communities, particularly the Coloured and Khoi-San people in South Africa.

It is not intended to offend, incite, or promote any unlawful action. All characters and scenarios are fictionalized or dramatized versions of real events.

If you laughed, got mad, or thought twice — mission accomplished.
Let’s talk, not fight. Let’s think, not burn.
✊🏽 Zabalaza... with jokes.

“You Are Not a Quitter” – A Message to the Man Rising, might BE slow or fast, but STILL RISING🔥No one can define you.The...
22/07/2025

“You Are Not a Quitter” – A Message to the Man Rising, might BE slow or fast, but STILL RISING🔥

No one can define you.

They can talk, assume, label, but they don’t know your war.
You're dangerous now — not because you seek destruction,
but because you survived it.

You are no longer naive.
Pain was your teacher.
Betrayal was your textbook.
You bled quietly, broke silently,
and stood up when no one clapped.

Yes — you were hurt.
Yes — they turned their backs.
Yes — the world was cold.
But you didn’t stay broken.

You’ve conquered chaos.
You’ve walked through storms that others wouldn’t survive a minute in.
You’ve buried the boy who sought validation —
and resurrected the man who demands respect.

No one supported you?
That’s not your excuse — that’s your edge.
You are not a victim — that mindset is done.
You’re not your past — that chain is broken.
The cycle of weakness ends with you.

You're not here to prove.
You're here to build, to lead, to protect, to become.

You are steel sharpened by fire.
You are discipline forged in silence.
You are focused. Unshakable.
A warrior in the age of comfort.

They may doubt you.
They may laugh.
But you’re not a quitter.

You don’t fold.
You don’t beg.
You rise.

You are the storm they never saw coming.
And your time…
is now.

🕶️🔥 BE CAREFULL, HITMAN IN THE SHADOWS 🔥🕶️Ek sê, in the streets of Jozi, trust is as rare as a taxi that's on time.Late ...
22/07/2025

🕶️🔥 BE CAREFULL, HITMAN IN THE SHADOWS 🔥🕶️

Ek sê, in the streets of Jozi, trust is as rare as a taxi that's on time.

Late one Friday night, the kasi was quiet—too quiet. Dogs weren’t barking. Even the skelms were inside. That’s when he stepped out the shadows...

A man in a black suit, balaclava tight, and sunglasses on—at NIGHT nogals. They call him “Ghost”, not because he disappears... but because if you see him, jy's klaar.

No one knows his real name. He doesn’t speak. Doesn’t flinch. Just walks in, does the job, and vanishes like mist in the Karoo sun.

Some say he works for the tender kings. Others whisper his number gets dialled when a deal goes sideways, or someone talks too much.

Last month, a big shot DJ from the North got taken out in traffic. Precision. Silence. No fingerprints, no license plate. Guess who was spotted nearby in the CCTV?

Ja, you guessed it.

“Ghost” was there. Watching. Waiting. And just like that... gone again.

You see, this world ain't safe when money means more than blood. People would rather hire a killer than fix their hearts. And the worst part? Some of these men in suits... sit in Parliament during the day.

So next time someone brags about knowing people in high places, ask them... do they know Ghost too?

Because in Mzansi, real power doesn't wear a tie—it wears a mask.

Hi Zabalaza Nation! 🌟 You can support me by sending Stars - they help me earn money to keep making content you love.When...
21/07/2025

Hi Zabalaza Nation! 🌟 You can support me by sending Stars - they help me earn money to keep making content you love.

Whenever you see the Stars icon, you can send me Stars!

20/07/2025

Ai Prudence... Be strong dear.

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