20/04/2025
Lesedi Khanya 👏🏾👏🏾 During initiation, uBaba/Gobela has eleven other initiates (amatwasa).
All of us are here for the same thing...to accept our calling and become healers. I seem to be the odd one out ...because everyone seem to have settled, yet I remain feeling lost. Everyone seem to be at home, except me. My journey is unlike theirs. I often ask if I am in the right place...or just lost!
As for abafowethu, my fellow trainees and peers I envy them daily. They are in the dlozi vibe that excites uBaba as it demonstrates amandla akhe ne-legacy as uGobela (spiritual trainer). I always feel like a lost sheep in Baba's kraal.
When they khwaza (call upon ancestors) their voice pierces through you and you get shivers down your spine. I don't need to scream, my people rock up anything even when I am unaware. Why do I need to make noose to call upon my people? I don't understand and my ancestors hate noise.
When they gida (dance), in unison you can feel their power to shake the world. I like watching their rhythmic movements, as from afar I get into a trance silently. Their chants get me to find a balance between my real world and the spiritual realm at the same time. I like that balance as it brings me peace. As my ancestors and I can't stand the noose and daily eventful havoc, we get in a bubble and fly away.
When they get in a trance (edlozini), you see sweat and tears dropping down their faces and bodies. Both my face and body bear no testimony of any spirit upon me. My people arrive and waltz in peace, whisper few truths and releave some secrets, reveal few names and occurrences, places and colours, drop a few herbs to aid the situation and ...just sit back and watch.
"I am the odd one"...was my daily revelation.
But I quickly learnt to not watch others because I...
came here alone ...0was gifted alone ...getting trained alone ...work alone ...live alone ...learn alone ...and serve alone. My name is Moleleki (one who chases others away) ...iKhehlaLoMfazi.
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