04/18/2026
I feel as though my worlds are colliding and different facets of myself are going head to head, fighting for dominance in my life, and it’s causing me a bit of grief on the inside. On the outside, that grief translates to the chip I have on my shoulder growing bigger than usual. When that happens, I tend to get a little defensive and toughen my already impenetrable armor, bracing for impact. Grounding myself so I do not waiver amongst the tension that is sure to follow…except it hasn’t happened. At least not yet. No tension. No impact. Just welcoming experiences and opportunities that aren’t asking me to change or pick a certain side of myself to present. Just. Be. Me. I was preparing for the fight of my life! Going over my talking points and the slide show presentation I had playing in a loop in my head to win an argument that I also made up. I share this because how many times can we admit to ourselves that quite often, the negative situations we find ourselves in were caused by us? Because we acted on emotions or scenarios that are imagined? Not reality. How many times have we missed out on opportunities or relationships because of a little, yet deadly thing I like to call self-sabotage? I’ve been there. More times than I can count. I challenge anyone who reads this to lean in to being able to recognize your own negative patterns of behavior. Don’t be the very person who sows and cultivates the seeds of your own destruction because you couldn’t stomach calling yourself out. One of the hardest pills to swallow as a human being is recognizing the part you play in your own god-damn suffering. We always want something or someone to blame. But trust me, self-awareness makes you part of the elite. Food for thought on this beautiful Saturday