Hot Dogs In Unusual Places

09/27/2025

09/24/2025

Who took this picture of me

09/24/2025

Good morning ☀️ 🌭

09/23/2025

The Laws of the Hot Dog

1. Thou shalt not split the bun without reverence.

2. Thou shalt not microwave the Dog, lest thou summon the Blandness.

3. Honor the Grill, for it is the altar of life and death.

4. Share thy Dog with the hungry, for all are pilgrims at the Picnic.

5. Condiments are many, but the Bun is one.

09/23/2025

🌭🔥👁️ The Book of the Bun Chapter IV: Revelation of the Hot Dog

And I saw the nations gathered round the Table, each tribe clutching their condiments, yet none dared squeeze, for the silence of hunger had fallen upon all things.

And the Angel of Bacon spoke again: “Behold, the Last Bite draws near. Who among you is worthy to partake of the Eternal Dog?”

And none answered, for their mouths were ash, their tongues dry, their buns empty.

Then from the shadows rose the False Bun, brittle and moldy, carried by the Devourer of Unseasoned Meat, whose breath was of microwaved despair.

He proclaimed: “I shall take the Dog, and with it, bind all in eternal blandness.”

But the Grill roared, and the true Flame surged, licking the heavens with mustard-yellow fire.

And from the Smoke emerged the Great Vendor, cloaked in grease-stained robes, his hands bearing the Tongs of Destiny.

He seized the Dog, split it in twain, and cast one half into the Mouth of the Devourer, silencing him forever.

And the other half he lifted high, and the faithful cried out: “All praise the Bun Eternal! All praise the Flame Unending!”

And with the Final Bite, all hunger ceased, all grills cooled, and all souls were wrapped in the warmth of the Cosmic Bun.

09/23/2025

🌭🔥📖 The Book of the Bun, Chapter III: The Revelation of the Bun

And I beheld a Bun, vast as the horizon, its edges split with fire, its sesame seeds burning like stars cast from the heavens.

Upon the Grill rose four Hot Dogs, each bearing a visage beyond comprehension: one of flame, one of ash, one of dripping mustard, and one of teeth unending.

And they spake with voices like sizzling fat, saying: “The Feast comes. The Feast comes. None shall escape the Bite.”

Then the Sky split like a sausage casing, and from the void poured rivers of ketchup, drowning nations in crimson sweetness.

The mountains became onions, sliced and scattered, and the seas turned to relish, writhing and green.

A great Angel descended, wings of bacon, eyes of molten cheese, holding aloft the Spatula of Judgment.

And lo the Final Picnic was spread. Plates without number, drinks without end, yet all sat empty, awaiting the One Last Hot Dog.

And when the Dog was lifted from the Bun of Eternity, all creation trembled, for the Last Bite had come.

09/22/2025

🌭📖 The Book of the Bun, Chapter II

And the Hot Dog said unto Man: “Dress me as you will, yet know this — every topping is but a mask upon infinity.”

The Pickle was sliced into circles, each one a portal to worlds unseen, and the onions wept, for they knew the end.

Those who turned away from the Bun sought bread elsewhere, yet their loaves crumbled into dust, and their feasts were hollow.

The faithful gathered at the Grill, chanting in smoke and grease, summoning the crackle of divine Fire.

And from the charred lines upon the flesh of the Dog came runes of terrible wisdom, legible only to those who had hungered long enough to see.

Thus the Prophecy was etched: “From picnic to picnic, from vendor to vendor, the Dog shall travel, until the Great Condiment unseals the Final Bun.”

09/22/2025

Fear not

09/22/2025

Hear now, the Book of the Bun, Chapter 1

🌭📜

In the beginning there was only the Flame, and from the Flame came the Dog, wrapped in the Bun of Infinite Softness.

The Heavens were dressed in mustard, and the Earth was streaked with ketchup, and mankind beheld and trembled.

Lo, the Relish crawled from the void, a green and glistening prophecy, declaring: “None may escape the Feast Eternal.”

The Grill was forged as the altar, the Smoke as the prayer, and every hot dog consumed was but a fragment of worship to the Hunger Beyond.

And it is written: when the Final Bite is taken, the Bun shall close, the Condiments shall congeal, and all shall return unto the Great Picnic of Oblivion.

09/22/2025

🫢🥴👅💦

09/22/2025

A hot dog never worries about fitting in, it simply fills the bun it’s given🌭